Ask Me Help Desk - I'm a bit down

I'm a bit down

Well, here we go. I'm 13, and I like a girl at school ( lets call her H.).
Of course, she doesn't like me *sighs*. I sometimes act strange when I'm with my friends, but whenever she comes around, I just get so depressed. One of my friends doesn't like H . Her friends doesn't like me, nor does most of the rest of the school. At least she doesn't hate me. We (my friends an H.) joke around, whacking each other (not intending to hurt one and other).
I've been bullyed since I started school and I've had eggs and firecrackers thrown at my front door. I also listen to metal ( no, don't stand for any opinions of any rockstar and I have no specific idol) but I haven't told my parents about my interests of music (I come from a very calm family). People at my school (usually the bullys) drink and hang out in bad places (like bars, etc). I don't have the guts to say that I like H, nor do I think that it would help me. The bullys are not picking on me as much as they used to do, and I know how to ignore them.
:o I'm very shy, too:o
all i want is some advice

/
/your depressed RRR (swedish thirteenyearold programming guy)

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/your depressed RRR (swedish thirteenyearold programming guy)

That's your problem its like me I am on my PC all day long but I make friends all you got to do is just talk to people stuff like that don't always let people hit you just hit them back and if you like that girl just go talk to her (if she does not have bf)

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don't always let people hit you just hit them back

Its our way to have fun - I'm pretty pathetic, huh?

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and if you like that girl just go talk to her (if she does not have bf)

I have talked to her, she doesn't have a boyfriend, but she just doesent seem to like me in that way:(

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that's your problem its like me I am on my PC all day long

I doo have a social life:mad:

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but I make friends

Are you implicating that I have no friends ( read the Q.) :mad:

I've tried doing most of what you said, but it's just isn't working *sigh*

Yes talk to the girl not about your feelings, but just normal stuff like how are you etc. make her laugh a lot, girls like a funny guy!
You will learn , at 13 you are so young!! It takes yearsss of experience

Thanks, but I'm sure she just doesen't like me. Can we talk about the metal issiue. ( I don't wan't to upset my parents )

You don't sound to be particularly depressed to me, you seem to be coping with the bullying very well also. You just seem a little upset that this girl has no interest in you.

Don't worry about girls, there are loads of opportunities for that! Hell I hardly knew any girls until I was 16 since I was in an all boys school. And look at me now.

My friend doesn't like H. he even asked me not to talk with her during the winter holidays. I just fell like I want to cry, but I can't. When I'm down, I often talk about violence and death, wich scares her friends.

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Originally Posted by rrr

my freind doesn't like H., he even asked me not to talk with her during the winter holidays. i just fell like i want to cry, but i can't. when i'm down, i often talk about violence and death, wich scares her freinds.

Your friends should not tell you who you not should talk to and you who you should talk to

Thanks, but still he did. He is a good friend of mine, but not my best. I know that there willl come other oppertuneties to find a girl, but I still can't help how I feel. My friend puts himself between me and H. I don't want to make that decision, but still...
*shouts*-WHY??

The girl is just a girl, you don't really need to worry about all that at your age, opportunities always come along when you aren't looking for them :)

That is what my rational senses tell me, but...

Also, it is not rare to have a crush at this age, just do your best not to worry about it :)

I just don't know what to do.

There's no a lot you can do apart from wait, focus on yourself and improving yourself, and most of all don't worry about it too much

I need some help with another issiue, too. I like listening to metal ex:
Slipknot
Killsitch engage
System of a down
And my parents don't know about it. I know that many rockstars are into drugs, and I am very againtst drugs, alcohol and tobacco and just don't wan't to upset my parents (who are very easily upset) because I don't want to ruin my good relationship with them.

I don't see why they would be upset about you listening to metal if they were understanding people.

Everyone experiments at your age, I know I listened to a lot of metal at your age, but my tatstes have mellowed a little.

As long as you reassure them that you aren't going to get into anything, you shouldn't be worried about telling them. They might be worried if you are going to a metal gig though - mainly because of your age, you are still young and impressionable :).

I'm pretty sure most reasonable people wouldn't worry about their son enjoying metal music

I do enjoy a bit of System of a Down, they are a lot more melodic than most metal - they are nearly rock I suppose :)

Thanks, you are very understanding. NO, I would never go to a metal gig (hate crowds). Thank you, you have helped me a lot. Man I just feel like what they (system of a down) sing in the song "lonley day".
*sigh*
Thank you.
And I'm 13 almost 14- sorry for not informing

Everyone feels lonely sometimes, surround yourself with friends and don't worry about H, those things sort themselves out.

I'm sure your parents will be very understanding about listening to metal if you sit and talk to them about it, don't be too worried :)

My friends are on vacation. Thanks for the help. *hugs freindly*
Ill go now to do some pushups. But check in sometimes (I'll probably keep on posting)
Bye!
*walks away, a bit happier*

rrr,

So are you involved in any activities? Like any sports or clubs at school? That's always a good way to make more friends and get more comfortable with other people.

One thing for you to know is that most people go through what your going through at your age.

12-16 (Most take longer, but most 16 y/o's think they know everything.. lol) ages 12-16 most people are realizing that the world is not about games and toys... its when we start to see the vastness of the world, and realize things about 'fitting in' and then we start to look at ourselves and try to figure out who we are, how we fit in, and most of all 'what do other people think about me?'

The trick is to like yourself. Like who you are and your beliefs. If you like who you are, then you believe in yourself, and what other people think about you matters less... therefor giving you confidence to be yourself.

Your guy friends, are they even into girls at all? Why doesn't he want you to talk to her?
My guess is that he is Jealous that you and her get along. As for her friends it may be the same reason.
You say your parents are sensitive... do you feel sheltered? Do you absolutely know that your parents would be upset with your choice of music? You don't think they would be the least bit understanding that you are growing up and just figuring out what you like. A lot of people like Metal and heavy rock but don't live the lifestyle of the bands. I am a girl, I love system of a down, and AFI, and Korn... among other types of music... but I am completely against drugs.

Music is just self expression. My guess is that you feel you have been sheltered and this music makes you feel free to express what's inside of you. I hope when you listen to it, that you don't feel violent or angry though... that may be what your parents are afraid of. Maybe if you talk to them and tell them why you like this music, maybe even share it with them and reassure them that you are not into the bands lifestyle, you just like the sound of it...

I have more to say but I am short on time... will try to get back to this later...

Best Wishes