Hello guys,

I was just wondering if I should contact my ex after 2 years?

Background: me and my ex were friends for 3 years before we decided to start dating we dated for 2 years. Things were good at first like all relationships but after while we started making each other everything in our life and things started going downhill.

I felt as she felt distant and found out she cheated one and was confused. I kept trying to her back but she said really mean things to me like she deserves better. So I stopped contacting her and went into nc. She contacted me once via text but I did not reply.

2 years later of not talking to her and not seeing her around, I sit here typing this post. My thoughts about the relationship now are how immature we were both and I wouldn't want to go back and just want to leave that in the past after all the break up was really hard on me. But I don't think I had closure. I just disappeared from her life. I heard a good ending makes a good beginning for a new relationship.

What makes a good beginning for a new relationship is healing. Are you talking about a relationship with her?
Two years have passed what is the point?

After I read your other posts, I really think that your focus should be to build a life for yourself that you enjoy, and makes you happy, rather than trying to recapture a better time in your life.

Bad Bad idea to contact her!

It's taken you all this time to get over this girl, so why in the world would you want to stir up all the old feelings again?

Let it go, after all, the relationship ended 2 years ago.

She must not of heard that saying about good endings make a good beginning. She cheated on you, and when you were willing to still be with her, she said some mean things to you.
She has not tried to get a hold of you in last 2years. She has moved on with her life.
A lot of people tend to look back and wonder "what if". Usually when we are lonely and wondering why we can't find the right one, who is our other half. We start remembering past relationships. Of course we tend to think of all the great times. For some reason the bad, hurtful ones are very cloudy, or we come up with excuses again for them. But the those hurtful ones are really the ones we need to remember they remind us of WHY we aren't with those ex's anymore.
Stop pretending to yourself that she was all that great. Get out and keep looking for your other half, the one that will really love you.

Honestly dude, after TWO YEARS of going your own way and forgetting about a person who mentally harmed you why would you want to go back to something like that. You have not let time heal you from her and you don't need closure after that long, is just going to remind you how things used to be and is going to make you sad. Forget about her and focus your energy in something else, like finding someone that is not going to screw you over for example. Remember that she cheated on you, destroyed your mental stability by saying bad things, and didn't respect or appreciate you while always talking down on you. You do not want someone like that in your life, go out there and go find things that benefit you as a person and don't think about things that have affected you in a negative way, look for things that will affect you in a positive way. So stop living in the future and enjoy the present so then when the future is the present, you will have good memories, not bad ones.

Good Luck,

Javi

Hey guys, trust me I do not want to get back with her. She hurt me way too much for me to go back and I know I am completely over her, I don't feel hurt, or angry anymore and I know she is not good for me.

However, its just some times I find myself thinking back about what if we were still together and I miss the feeling of actually being with someone. I have not dated or anything since the break up mainly because I felt as if I weren't ready. Now I just find myself alone, missing the feeling of having someone to be with.

I just think maybe the fact I haven't met the right person yet is because I did not leave things on good terms with my ex yet and once I do I would be able to start a brand new relationship with someone else without any baggage or anything. No?

If you keep looking back your either going to trip over your own feet or get a bad neck pain. Moving on means leaving all baggage behind period. After all this time do you really think she even thinks about all the little details.
If your completely over her, then get your backside out and meet some women. Im not saying you have to go out and fall in love, just get out and date. Its like opening the windows in spring to air out the house! Good luck

You haven't met the right person yet because your social life, and skills are deficient.

Talaniman Rule-When you stop looking for love, and do your thing, and enjoy ALL YOUR OPTIONS, AND OPPORTUNITIES, love will find you.

Talaniman Rule-Build a life that you enjoy without a mate and your happiness will attract people who will want to share in it with you.

Don't use closure with the ex as an excuse.

Talaniman Rule- Be honest with yourself, and be honest with others.

Sometimes we see what we want to see, and feel want we want to fee, and that maybe distracting us from seeing and feeling what's real. If you haven't unpacked your past baggage, your not over it yet. I can only suggest you look, and move forward, as the past is GONE, except in your own mind.

You are not ready yet. You're still in the "what if" stage.
How it ended does not matter. Are you over and emotionally healthy?

" she hurt me way too much for me to go back and i know i am completely over her"

So then why contact her?

If she hurt you badly and it's been over 2 years, then what's the point?

Just leave it alone.

Move on.

"my thoughts about the relationship now are how immature we were both and i wouldnt want to go back and just want to leave that in the past"

So why?

You answered your own question.

Its been 2 years. Leave it. Keep moving forward.

Find new loves.