Ask Me Help Desk - Questions on Rape

Ok I have only told one other person about this before. I was raped several times by my sons father 5 to 6 years ago. He threatened to take away our child if I ever spoke of this. I had blocked most of it out of my mind. Till recently he is trying to get coustody and the memories of him doing these things started to come back to me. I tried to tell someone before and they told me what's the use you are already pregnant by him who will believe you? I shoved it away. He is a dead beat dad and is 9,000 or more behind in child support. I know if I said something now people will think that I am only saying it because of what he is trying to do now. But I am not. I am afraid of people and what they might say. I am scard to even get close to another guy and now I remember why. I live in Georgia and was just wondering if I came forth with this information what might happen to him and me. Will they believe me after all these years? Will they do anything. I don't want to bring it up I just wanted to know. I don't think that I will get over this any time soon. Just wantewd to know.

Quote:

Originally Posted by dixiepme2

Ok I have only told one other person about this before. I was raped several times by my sons father 5 to 6 years ago. He threatened to take away our child if I ever spoke of this. I had blocked most of it out of my mind. Till recently he is trying to get coustody and the memories of him doing these things started to come back to me. I tried to tell someone before and they told me whats the use you are already pregnat by him who will believe you? I shoved it away. He is a dead beat dad and is 9,000 or more behind in child support. I know if I said something now people will think that I am only saying it because of what he is trying to do now. But I am not. I am afraid of people and what they might say. I am scard to even get close to another guy and now I remember why. I live in Georgia and was just wondering if I came forth with this information what might happen to him and me. Will they believe me after all these years? Will they do anything. I don't want to bring it up I just wanted to know. I don't think that I will get over this any time soon. Just wantewd to know.

i am sorry for......

to comment on this i am still young but wat i think is.....

as u said before dat he threatened u not to say a word to others about it.....

wat hav been d use of it nywayz...

atlast he want the kid.....

u dont b afraid of ny one i belief urself n speak d truth....

i kno how hopeless u might b feelin...

in all cases u hav to wayz out...

either to face it ( which is hard....support the truth)

the other is to run away from d situation n avoid n run away...

still i say dat i am 19 years...

may not understand ur problem to depth

still wanted to help......sorry if hurt

Quote:

Originally Posted by dixiepme2

Ok I have only told one other person about this before. I was raped several times by my sons father 5 to 6 years ago.

Hello dixie:

ONE time, 5 years ago MIGHT wash. But, nobody is going to believe that he raped you SEVERAL times. Certainly, if he did it the first time, you would never have let him in the second time...

Go to court. MAKE him pay child support. DO this for your child - not for you.

excon

Ok, not being an expert on mental anguish over this, I would say get a good counselor to start with to deal with your emotional pain and problems.

There is a statue of limitation for prosecution but I honestly don't remember what it is in GA. You would talk to the DA and he would see if you have enough evidence to go forward, like another person you told at the time it happened even. But honestly it would to many appear to be a ex mad over custody or other issues wanting to get back at the other person. There is no physical evidence, just your word against his word unless he confesses. So I don't know if the DA would take it to trial or not,

But at this point, a good counselor and talk to a criminal attorney

If you now have custody, its going to be hard for him to get custody if he's behind in his support payments. Frankly, I would not take the tack that he raped you. You are right that your crediblity and ability to prove it would be highly questioned. But if you say he physically abused you, especially if you have some record of it, that should help prevent him getting custody.

Chuck is right, though, that you need to see a counselor to help resolve your emotional issues.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

If you now have custody, its going to be hard for him to get custody if he's behind in his support payments. Frankly, I would not take the tack that he raped you. You are right that your crediblity and ability to prove it would be highly questioned. But if you say he physically abused you, especially if you have some record of it, that should help prevent him getting custody.

Chuck is right, though, that you need to see a counselor to help resolve your emotional issues.

In Arkansas, it does not matter if you are behind on your child support. Child custody and child support are two different cases.

To the OP, if you feel that he is capable of this act again I think it's a moral obligation to report it. If he is using these past acts of violence to intimidate you, then you are talking about a whole different crime altogether which should be reported as well. If you could get him to threaten violence or refer to the past acts while in a custody battle, it could be considered witness tampering. It wouldn't be a bad idea to try and record him on the telephone admitting to these acts before you go to the police about them. The first person you might want to consult is a private investigator. Please be careful if you use that advice and don't put your safety or your child's at risk.

Quote:

Originally Posted by dixiepme2

Ok I have only told one other person about this before. I was raped several times by my sons father 5 to 6 years ago. He threatened to take away our child if I ever spoke of this. I had blocked most of it out of my mind. Till recently he is trying to get coustody and the memories of him doing these things started to come back to me. I tried to tell someone before and they told me whats the use you are already pregnat by him who will believe you? I shoved it away. He is a dead beat dad and is 9,000 or more behind in child support. I know if I said something now people will think that I am only saying it because of what he is trying to do now. But I am not. I am afraid of people and what they might say. I am scard to even get close to another guy and now I remember why. I live in Georgia and was just wondering if I came forth with this information what might happen to him and me. Will they believe me after all these years? Will they do anything. I don't want to bring it up I just wanted to know. I don't think that I will get over this any time soon. Just wantewd to know.

I'm really sorry to hear what happened to you, but you have to tell someone, no one can tell you if they will believe you or not, only a lawyer can do that, but you have to speak out, he cannot get away with what he did, because you might not be the only person... you could be helping other people by coming out...

Kitty xxx