Two years after dumping me, ex contacted me, wants to explain what happened.
So she's been im'ing me more and more. Its been really sketchy. She's still with the guy she started seeing right after she left me. So I know she doesn't want to get back together. So today, he finally spills it. She's been thinking about how we ended it. She says, if you think there's closure between us I have something on my mind. She admits that she feels guilty and wants to tell me something. All this after two years of me going through the hardest most difficult thing in my life. She's all blissfull and junk with her guy and she seems to think I'm doing just as well. I played it as subtle as I could.
Hi
ME: hey, how are you tonight?
I'm all right, a bit tired.
Ok, I don't really know how to put this out there but do you feel like there's closure between us?
ME: I'm not sure.
ME: what's on your mind? I do not know how to answer that question. It was a long road for me.
Well, I still feel like I owe you some answers
I didn't really give them to you at the time
But if your good, than that's cool
ME: after all this time you feel like telling me..
It comes to mind every now and then.
I thought I was doing fine. I did lots of dating and stuff. But when she said that, I got super nervous and upset. I can't believe it still affects me.
What do you all think I should do? I feel stupid that she still upsets me. I never contact her. Not since the week she dumped me two years ago. She always contacts me. She always makes the effort. And I always try to play it as neutral and cool as I can.
Should I listen to what she has to say? I am scared that I won't react well to whatever secret she has to reveal. I've come to peace with what happened as far as I knew... its been that way for a long time now. So I'm afraid that what she says will... do something or upset me.
Thoughts?
Comment on KoolAide187's post
Thank you KoolAide... I knew someone was going to say that. Its up to me. I think I'll likely kick myself when I finally get around to hearing it :-/ But like you said, it'll bother me if I DON'T hear it! I'll have trouble sleeping tonight.
Comment on Justwantfair's post
Interesting points. Very valid points. :[ Ugh, this is so hard. I'm stuck. But thank you so much, I appreciate your response. I think she feels some intense guilt or something. She was hoping to make herself feel better.
Comment on YeloDasy's post
Wow, I'm glad to know that I'm not odd for still feeling emotions over this. She was my first girlfriend, and I tend to make strong bonds with people. It bugs me that I've been single while she went right into a new relationship. She never felt the loss.
Comment on Imabadman's post
She contacts me every 2 or 3 months. I'm certainly not a puppy in waiting as you say. That was the most we'd spoken in over a year. She is still lingering around, I don't know why. She finds reasons to talk to me. Usually just "how are you".