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-   -   My father didn't recognise me (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=516888)

  • Oct 15, 2010, 05:23 AM
    Leonardo1000
    My father didn't recognise me
    I just found out that my father is in America (California). I live in Europe.
    20 years ago he escaped in America to avoid the process (recognition).
    He never aided my mother.

    Now, What can I do to force him to recognise me and to pay something? How is the law in California?

    What about Inheritance? Can I except something as firstborn?

    Thank you very much for your help.

    Bye
  • Oct 15, 2010, 05:59 AM
    smoothy

    Children are ENTITLED to no inheritance. Doesn't matter if you are the first or last born. Parents are free to leave their wealth and property to whomever they wish. While it is usually their children, it isn't always nor is it required to be.

    You can't make him recognise you . You are an adult. Anything he may have done in europe would have to have been prosecuted in your home country under its laws.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 07:22 AM
    Fr_Chuck

    You can not make him accept you as his child, and unless there was a court order for child support made when you were a child there is nothing that can be done. ( and you can not even do that, your mother would have had to do that)

    And you while as his child, you may have a claim to his estate when he dies, that will depend on where he is living at the time of his death, and if he has a will. He has no obligation to leave you anything at his death. *** First born has no special rights at all in the US
  • Oct 15, 2010, 08:26 AM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Hi, I don't want make him accept me, I want him to pay, because he never helped my M.
    There's a court order, and there was a monthly amount, but I don't know why, he runned away before the DNA test, and his name is not on my birth certif.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 08:29 AM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    My mother did everything possible, there was a process... but he escaped in America... and I found him using Google (funny isn't it ?)... because he has a medical studio with his name.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 08:36 AM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    I can't make him recognise? 20 years ago his lawyer said: My client want to do the DNA test to prove that (me) is not his child... but he has to go back to his own country... The letter was written by the lawyer, my father was already gone away
  • Oct 15, 2010, 08:37 AM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    As you can see, English is not my mother language... sorry
  • Oct 15, 2010, 08:37 AM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    As you can see, English is not my mother language... sorry
  • Oct 15, 2010, 08:45 AM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    In my country the wife and child's receives always something... the law is planned that way.
    You don't receive nothing just if you are "dispossessed"
  • Oct 15, 2010, 09:03 AM
    smoothy

    Well, I assumed english wasn't your first language (but you do write it well).

    The problem is he is in the USA... he has been in the USA for many years. Here, American law is what applies. While he remains in the USA... its what American law allows. And if his assets are all here, if he gives EVERYTHING to another person organisation or charity there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. Sorry, but that's his right. As was mentioned, if he died without a will, then you might argue FOR the assets in probate court.

    As I said... most people give what they have to their children upon their death... but many don't for any number of reasons. As much as it may upset you, what applies in your country doesn't apply here unless we have a similar law.

    If he ever returned to your home country then your laws there would apply.


    You used the word entitlement... that means you have the right to something... what you believe you should get, is not the same as what you have the right to get.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 09:34 AM
    ShineYourEyes
    If you are 20 years and you don't know what to do with your life but looking for an inheritance somewhere is not a good sign that you have developed properly. Get up and use the opportunity you have and not the one you didn't have. IF you continue to cry over a spill milk, I'm sorry.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 09:45 AM
    smoothy
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ShineYourEyes View Post
    If you are 20 years and you don't know what to do with your life but looking for an inheritance somewhere is not a good sign that you have developed properly. Get up and use the opportunity you have and not the one you didn't have. IF you continue to cry over a spill milk, I'm sorry.

    That and the man may live to be 105 for all any of us know (nobody without a terminal illness has any idea how long they will live). That's a long, LONG time to wait for something, assuming he actually has much of any value at that time. For all any of us know we could die in an accident today... or live long enough to be the oldest living person... or anything in between. Make the most of what you do have... and don't waste it thinking about what if. We can't change the past... but how you approach life WILL influence what you make of your future.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 01:45 PM
    cdad

    This is an interesting question. I have to ask you. From what you know was there any type of court or governing proceedings that went on when he was suppose to go through the process of recognition?

    Also I didn't see what country you are in and it may make a difference. There is actually a possibility that he may owe for back child support. The money wouldn't be owed to you but to your mother.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:13 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on ShineYourEyes's post
    You are talking with the wrong person, I don't need his money... I want him to pay... maybe is a little revenge... for all the efforts my mother have done. Maybe for you this situation is normal, but I don't think so.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:28 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    Okay Okay this is not a problem, my first goal is not his money... I wrote to him... and he didn't had the courage to answer. He's a bastard, he's a doctor, he has money... he supports politicians of his town with donations... and he never...
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:31 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    Helped my mother. I want my little revenge... and I want to finish want my mother started 20 years ago with the process. I give him his last chance... after I will get in touch with a lawyer.. and his new family will know everything.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:36 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    Is better for him to answer, to recognise me... to give some money to my mother telling: Sorry, I'm a bastard.
    I will have my little revenge... in one way or another
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:43 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on smoothy's post
    My questions were general... I just want to now how does it works in USA... and if is possible to force him to recognise me with a DNA test. If is possible I will hire a laywer in California... and we will see
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:46 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on califdadof3's post
    There's a court order, and there was a monthly amount, but I don't know why, he runned away before the DNA test, and his name is not on my birth certif.
  • Oct 15, 2010, 02:50 PM
    Leonardo1000
    Comment on califdadof3's post
    I'm in Swtzerland, is pretty impossible to find here a lawyer how knows USA laws... maybe you can find some... but they are specialized in finanacial and economics matter... certenlz not in family law =)

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