I need some advice on to how to handle this situation. My daughter has invited my good friend, husband and young adult children to her wedding. Today my friend called to ask if her daughter could bring her boyfriend as they plan to have his parents babysit their 10 year old and he would drive down from college with her. My daughter has invited only spouses or couples who are engaged (the only possible exception would be the attendants, however she did not even invite her sister's boyfriend). She does not want to make an exception for one person but the budget does not allow her to expand the guest list. How can we tactfully handle this situation without hurt feelings?

You just did. Explain to them that you have no leeway in the guest count and its impossible for you to add any more.

She didn't invite her sister's boyfriend?

I find that insulting.

What I would do is invite the sister. And ask the sister if she wants the boyfriend there.

If she says yes, then he should be there. If she says no, its OK. Then he doesn't have to be there.

So I hope she was asked because when my brother gets married, and if he did that to me, I would have a few words with him. But then, I know my brother and he would never do something like that to me.

As for what to tell them.

I would tell them exactly what you told us. That it is limited number of guests and you can't invite a million others.

In the case of a friends, daughter's boyfriend is one thing, sisters boyfriend, is another, in my opinion.

So basically, tell them you would love to but you just don't have the room.

Just to clarify so you don't think my oldest is slighting her younger sister they discussed this among themselves and as the younger one did not have a steady boyfriend (they change with the wind) she said she did not care if she was invited to bring a "guest" or not. Her brother does not have a girlfriend and also is not bringing a guest. They plan to have a grand time none the less.