I am currently 17 years old. I am in college and on probation for 4 years. (not a convicted felon) my boyfriend is 28 years old, and we are enganged. Since I am under age we have to get marrried through the court, or at least have permission by a judge of course. My mother is willing to give her consent, she doesn't have FULL custody of me, but shez the only gurdian I have. My father is no longer in my life and hasn't been for about 7 years now due to domestic violence repeatedly in the past, child abuse, DUI,battery and assults. I've practically been on my own since 13. My mom once let my ex's dad take guardianship. But now his time is up and she has guardianship once more. Me and my fiancee` have criminal backgrounds, but we both are showing our progress in life. I'm majoring in Medical Billing and Coding, and he just got a job for the first time since he got out of prison.we are trying to get our marriage license. But the lady at the desk told us that we would have to go before a judge to see if my mom could just give her consent because we have no contact with my dad.How do you think this will go down?

What in the world is your boyfriend thinking? You are almost half his age?

Are you sexually active with this person? If you are stop now before you become pregnant.

Are you really sure that your mother would consent to your marriage? If you were my daughter, I would have the man arrested or at the very least investigated for dating a minor!

Take several days and Think - Think - Think before you jump out on a bridge that may ruin your life.

Samantha, I can't say what a judge would say. However, I would almost bet that he would have the same question I do: Why not wait the few months until you are 18 to get married?

It would give you both a bit longer to be established in rebuilding yourselves and you would have the ability to start your marriage off on a stronger foundation.

Like donf, I am trying to understand how a 17 year old becomes involved with a 28 year old. While I am glad both of you are turning your lives around (congratulations), I am concerned about how long you have known him and how you met. How long was he in prison and when did he get out? Did you meet him after he was released?

I am hoping you aren't rushing into marriage to run away from something else.

Doesn't seem like you have had much stablity in your life. No one to depend on being there for you. Life is hard, and even harder for a 13yro to have so much on her shoulders. Usually when someone has had to carry those responsibilties by themselves its hard to not to be blinded by what they feel is "unconditional love and acceptance" relationship.
You both have criminal records, and at least for him on adult. If he is just getting out of prison. Then at least be wise enough to know, most just getting out are really wanting to put their lives in order, and will strive to achieve that. Some will do exactly that, and unfortunately some will not. I agree with advice to wait till your 18, give him that time to really see if he can succeed or not. It also give him the time to see if your wanting to really to make more of your life.
If your already in a relationship and no one is stopping that, what is the rush for marriage. If it's the real deal then waiting won't end it, it will only build stronger bonds.

Well just wonder if boyfriend is closer to moms age than yours ? And also wonder if you are not replacing a need for a father figure with this man.

So I would recommend a lot of counseling before you get married.

But no I doubt a judge will approve this, if no attempt has been made to contact the father to at least see if he would approve and sign.

I also think the judge will have some of the same issues we have with the age difference at this stage in your life. If you were 30 and he 41 it is at a different time in your life.

I also think that since you can get married regardless of how wrong it may be, at 18, the cost and trouble and time to get to court , it would be silly to not merely wait another year.

I think this goes down as another bad choice. Sorry, but 17 is not the ideal age to get married while you are trying to straighten out your life from other bad choices. Further, I think the guy you are thinking of marrying needs time to straighten out some of his bad choices too, and I am sure a judge might see the same thing.