My husband and I are going to court over a DV case I filed against him. It has been a couple of months and I would like to try to work on our relationship we do have children together. He has never harmed me in front of them. We go to court on the 6th of October for the trial he had plead not guilty. (he does not want this on his record) is there anyway we can still have contact with one another? Even if he takes the Deffferment Plea? Will he get probation? Its his first offence and it's a misdomenour.

What does the Court say about contact? We have no idea if you are forbidden to have contact or not.

If this is his first offense, a misdemeanor, I would venture a guess that he will get a suspended sentence IF he completes counselling. Of course, only the Judge knows for sure.

And now the personal advice - you are going to reconcile because he never harmed you IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN. He apparently only hurt you in private.

I think you also should go in for counseling because this is classic battered woman syndrome - "he never meant to hurt me ..." and so forth.

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Originally Posted by lelalu

My husband and I are going to court over a DV case i filed against him. It has been a couple of months and i would like to try to work on our relationship we do have children together. He has never harmed me infront of them. We go to court on the 6th of October for the trial he had plead not guilty. (he does not want this on his record) is there anyway we can still have contact with one another? Even if he takes the Deffferment Plea? Will he get probation? its his first offence and its a misdomenour.

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Does your husband have an attorney? What happened that led to these charges being filed against him? How long ago did the incident occur?

The court will usually inform the defendant of things they are/are not allowed to do - including no contact orders. Was your husband instructed not to have contact with you, or simply not to discuss the case with you?

I'm going to add my two cents in here as well: my stepkids watched a disturbing relationship between their mother and her fiancé. This relationship included police contact a minimum of four times in one year, twice being due to physical fighting between the two of them. My stepkids now think that it wasn't her fiance's fault that he shoved her into a patio door - she told them it was because he drank alcohol and alcohol "makes you go crazy." (If it were the alcohol, he'd be beating everyone up - not just his fiance) It went so far that he was swinging their baby around and threatening to kick in the television.

Making excuses doesn't make it okay. You need to consider your children and their well-being.

He has never harmed you in front of them (the children) I guess you mean. How decent of him not to beat you up in front of the children. That means they won't think he is a completely bad *** in later years unless you tell them of course. You are falling into the trap most women of domestic violence encounter, and that is denial. You don't think he will never do it again I suppose ? If he has done it several times, he is not finished yet and you could wind up in the hospital and then what would happen to the children? I urge you to consider your change of heart, lelalu, or you are going to be just another statistic. I don't like that he is pleading not gulty because he doesn't want this on his record. It is already a matter of record now and the courts don't take kindly to a man who beats up on his wife, in front of the children, or not in front of the children. Wait and see how it plays out in court.

Tick

If the police didn't read me my Miranda rights, have my DOB wrong, and a DV is my first offense besides a couple speeding tickets, can I get away from all the charges if she decides to drop or what is there that I can do?