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-   -   On a scale of 1-10, how is this song I wrote? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=507688)

  • Sep 14, 2010, 10:45 PM
    Kaybear1011
    On a scale of 1-10, how is this song I wrote?
    Okay so I'm co-writing this song with my band member. I want to know how it is so far. It needs a lot of work I know. But would you listen to it? And does it sound like it could go both ways? Cause I'm a girl and the co-writing is a guy. He hasn't seen or heard what I have yet, so I need it to be kind of perfect when I show him! And he'll be singing so yeahhh... so here it is, feel free to leave comments and opinions! Thanks.

    “here together, gone forever”


    It started as a game,
    Ended with a heartbreak,

    You were my forever,
    And I was your always,

    We laughed and we cried,
    We had our ups and our downs,

    But you're leaving today,
    And I'm not okay,

    I loved you,
    And you loved me,
    We we're here together,
    Fighting forever,

    I watched with tears in my eyes,
    As you said your final goodbyes,
    You got to me,
    And I didn't want to let go,
    I held on tight,
    Prayed we'd be all right,
    But I know I'm just holding you back,

    Cause we were here together,
    And I know you're going forever,

    All I'll have are the memories,
    Of you and I,
    Trying to forget the goodbyes,
    When you cried,
    And I wanted to die,
    We fought that night,

    When we were here together,
    And now you're going forever,

    Well what am I supposed to do,
    With this half empty heart, Its broke in two,
    And the other half is with you, You left,
    And I don't know what to do,

    Without you be my side,
    Nothings new,
    But the memories of when you were here that day, And now you're gone forever. __________________________________________________ ____________________Its about a boy/girl having to move away or go to college, if this has ever happened to you, feel free to help with the lyrics, or share stories! I'd love to hear them! Thanks!
  • Sep 14, 2010, 10:49 PM
    Wondergirl

    Can you fix the weirdo characters that appeared when you pasted it from Word? Do you have music for it yet?

    I like it. I'd like to hear it with music.
  • Sep 14, 2010, 10:51 PM
    Kaybear1011
    Sorry, I'll re-post it.
  • Sep 15, 2010, 12:24 AM
    shaileyjay
    I really love the lyrics.. id love to hear it be played.. it can definitely go both ways. Wicked song! :)
  • Oct 9, 2010, 01:50 PM
    lJ.

    The quality of a song can depend upon many factors. From just song writing it can depend. It depends how the song connects to you, or another person, and the quality of the writing. In general as a song, it depends if you can write the notes for it, but in this case it depends on the song writing.

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