I am at the most complicated crossroads in my life
Here's the short and sweet... I am married. I have been married for almost 3 years. I've been unhappy for the past 2 years. I found comfort in another man. At first, it started innocent, just talking as friends. It gradually became stronger than friendship. I have not cheated on my husband and he knows of my new friend. He does not know the depth of my feelings for my new friend, and I am afraid to tell him.
My friend is much older than me (over twice my age in fact) and tells me that we cannot be together because of the age difference. He says that there is no future for me with him. I understand where he is coming from, I truly do, but that does not stop the feelings I have for him.
Before he and I began talking, he began to make amends with his wife. They had been separated for over 10 years. He did not tell me about his wife until a couple of days ago. He was seeing her again when we began talking. I know he deceived me and lied to me. As tender as my heart is, I forgave him. I still have intense feelings for him. We have slowed our talking, because neither of us want to stir our spouses. We both want to make amends with our spouses.
We agree that certain things between us can never happen again, but I can't help but think of him all the time. We used to talk from the time I woke up every morning to the time a went to bed at night. Now, because he is spending so much time with his wife, we can't only talk while he is at work. My husband knows that we talk all day. My friend's wife knows nothing of me. He is afraid that if she finds out she will be extremely angry.
I can push aside my feelings for my best friend to keep him in my life AS my best friend and nothing more. How should I react to him not telling his wife about me?
Comment on Kitkat22's post
Yes, I have met him. No, I did not meet him online. He is a regular at the Travel Plaza where I work. We met over a year ago, but we just began really talking a month ago.