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-   -   Can my friends mom adopt me with out my mom giving me up? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=506651)

  • Sep 11, 2010, 08:11 AM
    haleyr14
    Can my friends mom adopt me with out my mom giving me up?
    I've been trying to figure out if my friends mom could adot me? I'm only 14 but I can't stand living at my house anymore. My parents got divorsed last year and I stay with my moms ex husband. He's not my birth father and now he's not related to me in anyway. I get that I get rules and everything but the problem is that he yells at me for no reason half the time, he won't let me talk to someone that's been in my life for over a year now and means a lot to me and they never did anything to hurt me or him, he doesn't trust me and I don't know why I never lied to him. When my friends meet him and come over here they don't even want to stay because he gets mad at times and yells and scares them. When ever I have to make plans with them they always want me to go to there house. I can't do anything he always says not tonight but then all I do is sit and watch TV. I know I'm not aloud to do everything I want to do but he has never had a reason to yell at me and keep me at home 24/7 and not trust me. So I would like to know if I can get adopted by my friends mom that is wiling to adopt me she's the one that suggested it because she sees how it is at my moms and she thinks hes's crazy and out of his mind. But would she be able to with out my moms signature or my birth dads signature?? Or how could she adopt me??
  • Sep 11, 2010, 08:21 AM
    JudyKayTee

    No, you cannot be adopted without the written consent of your parents.

    If "he" is, indeed, "crazy and out of his mind," then your friend's mother MUST report to the authorities that you are in physical or mental danger.

    Where is your mother in this scenario?
  • Oct 20, 2010, 11:38 AM
    cdezimm
    I am in the exact situation. He won't even let me she my best friend or boyfriend for NO REASON at all. He simply "doesn't like" them. I don't really see how it matters to him how HE likes as long as they're my friends and not causing harm to anyone. I asked my mom yesterday if I could live with my best friend cause her parents agree (the one I'm not allowed to see) and she said I couldn't until I was sixteen.
  • Oct 20, 2010, 06:10 PM
    dontknownuthin

    I agree with Judy. Does your mom live with her ex-husband, or do you live with him by yourself? Where is your dad? Why aren't you living with one of your parents?

    Your mother could potentially give consent for you to live with your friend and for them to have temporary guardianship if she's trying to get her life together or going through a tough time. People sometimes do this if they don't want to give up their children for adoption, but also aren't able to care for them for a period.

    I would suggest you talk to your friend's parents and ask them to help you find out what can be done and yes, if you are being abused and aren't even with anyone who has legal rights to you, the authorities should be contacted. They may agree to permit your friend's parents to be a foster family for you.
  • Oct 20, 2010, 06:17 PM
    ScottGem

    Actually your friend's parents need to back off here. They could be sued for parental interference by encouraging you. If they think your home life is abusive and dangerous then they can report it to children's services. But frankly you are better off talking to a school guidance counselor about it.

    BTW this is a legal issue and has been moved from the Adoption forum.
  • Oct 20, 2010, 06:25 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Well of course one persons interfering with boyfriend, is protecting a younger child from a possible danger. I am sure if you read the 1000's of posts where young girls are wanting to date some varioius boys there can be dangers ( but then this is just some guess

    But no, the bio parents both father and mother will have to give up rights for someone to be adopted.

    And I did not hear where the bio mom is in all of this.

    But yes, beyond reporting a real threat to the child's health, the other kids parents need to stay out of it

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