Ask Me Help Desk - My mother hates me?

I'm 15 and I love my mother.But I think she hates me.She always treats me and my stepdad bad.I really love her so much,try to make her feel the best she can.But she always calls me bad things like I didn't grow up,I'm acting like a child,I am not a responsible etc.. For the past days I am really trying to be responsible,I'm not acting like a child,I never did since I was a child lol.. I'm so ****ing bored of this life,I even considered suiciding,but life is worth enjoying..

Just a bit ago she said she hates us both(me and my stepdad) and that we are like strangers to her.I never did anything wrong.She always argues with us and always treats us bad.I'm so ****ing fed up

You never said how old your mother is. Is she sick in any way? This could help us maybe give you some insight.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lonelyguy123

I'm 15 and I love my mother.But I think she hates me.She always treats me and my stepdad bad.I really love her so much,try to make her feel the best she can.But she always calls me bad things like I didn't grow up,I'm acting like a child,I am not a responsible etc..For the past days I am really trying to be responsible,I'm not acting like a child,I never did since I was a child lol..I'm so ****ing bored of this life,I even considered suiciding,but life is worth enjoying..

Just a bit ago she said she hates us both(me and my stepdad) and that we are like strangers to her.I never did anything wrong.She always argues with us and always treats us bad.I'm so ****ing fed up

She may be going through some difficult times you don't really know about.
I am sure she doesn't hate you.
And parents will sometimes say things they mean for your own good in hurtful ways.
But it is because they love you and want you to do well. If she really didn't care she would probably say nothing.

If you want to do things to make her feel better, ask her what she needs you to do to help her out.
Or after dinner tell her to rest and you do the dishes.

Talk to her. She is your mother and it could do you both a world of good to learn to really communicate.

There is so little information here.

If you are saying you need to know how to improve your relationship with your mother, we need to know what your relationship is, other than you think she hates you, and says nasty things.

Is this a sudden change, has she been like this for six months, a week, three years? What has happened, if this is a relatively sudden change toward you, to cause that.

Have you tried to talk to her, and communicate in a meaningful way? Words hurt, but there is always a reason for them whether it has nothing to do with you or not.

You make it sound like she is an angry person, and out of the blue she takes her anger out on you for no apparent reason.

Can you give a few examples of how these situations come about? Why does she think you are not being responsible, and acting like a child as you said.

Thanks for any information you can add. From reading what you have said so far, one can only guess at what's really going on.

Wow, like what the other two posted. At your age it is important to have a good self esteem. You are right to claim that you are not the things she says. Hold onto that! Remake the tapes in your own head, hear her saying how wonderful you are and that she is so proud of you! Play only the good ones the rest of your life.

If you can, do service through school or church with others who will tell you the truth. The best exercise you can do is reaching down and lifting someone else up. You are priceless and loved.

Pray for her since you can't see illness sometimes:physical or mental;& she may be eating the wrong foods.

(Friend of mine had a mom who had an aneurism in the brain and was in her words "Nuttier than a March Hare". Left her and her bros and sises for days at motels; sometimes without food)

If her self esteem is low, then that could be why she is lashing out at you; friends and others can do the same. Don't take it on, know yourself - Journal strengths and weaknesses then destroy so no one will see. May be difficult and take time, but clean up your speech. Think sweet, attract sweet. Watch the inflection of your words as well - they indicate our true feelings. Demonstrated to my kids when they were little that I could tell the cat very kindly how stupid it was and it would purr and be amiable; but when I screamed at it that it was a really beautiful cat and I loved it, it ran.
Also, read books on handwriting analysis; and body language. (There is one called Dating the Write Way for teens.) Sometimes we convey things to others through these that we don't want to let be know. And/Or you may be able to discern when to cut the conversation; or what her issue is - Say, father, mother, or childhood issue may be.
Good book to get, and you may want to hide it There's a hole in My Chest by Bill Jerema. $10/I would check it out of the library. Can be read in about an hour. Go get yourself a cup of cocoa and read at Starbucks or somewhere safe. Many of us have come through it and gone on to be very happy. May you also find Peace and Joy. Gracie