My nephew is 10 yrs. Old and I have been helping is mother in raising him in the last 2 yrs. He is very defiant, he breaks all rules, he steals from school and home, he lies every second of every day,he has tried to hurt animals, he has killed frogs, he wets the bed when he gets mad,he pooped in his pants at school the other day, he changed the pants, but kept the dirty underwear on, we have tried everything, we have tried to reward him when he is good, we praise him often, we always tell him that we love him very much, we also have spanked, and time out, no games, no toys, no outside, no bike, no TV, nothing works, he doesn't care about anything,he is never satisfied, he wants a toy we buy it, 5 minutes later he has broke it, we are at our wits end, he has seen counselors,he has an IEP, we were told he needs a controlled structured environment and we can't find anyone who will place him,any information would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much!

Patti Rogers
>Number Removed< mom's number Trudy

Have the professionals suggested a residential facility that deals with this kind of problem?

With all the intervention this child has had, has there ever been a full psychiatric evaluation?

If so, I presume that there was a plan in place to deal with him. If not, why hasn't there been such an assessment.

Has his behaviour become worse, or more intense? Have his parents attended counselling or talked to school counsellors, and if so, is this ongoing because he remains out of control?

Putting a 10 year old into an institution, other than for evaluation purposes isn't likely to happen. More likely would be more intervention, evaluation, perhaps medication, and strict instructions and follow-up visits or appointments to chart his progress.

I understand your frustration, but I don't see the other side of the coin, and that is any continuing or ongoing work with counsellors, doctors, Psychiatrists, etc. You said he has seen counsellors, but who has evaluated him for mental illness.

With him being out of control, and you and his parents being worn out, and without knowing more of the medical and psychiatric end of this, if he has not had more formal help and assessment, have you considered setting this up, or recommending to his mother? You haven't mentioned the child's father, is he in the picture as well?