Hello,

My ex had cheated on me many times and eventually dumped me for her ex. She dumped me by blaming me that I hurt her, she once told me she cannot break up if she has too and will do it on the phone, but she did it in the worst possible way.. blamed me for hurting her and went back to her ex and thereafter never called up. Having cheated on me many many times and I forgave her like a fool every time thinking that now she would change.

Anyway, I am going to be in the same party as her soon. I want to know if we see each other (and we will).. should I say hi and ask her how is she or simply ignore her? I feel it will be too bad not to even say hi but again after what she did.. I don't know. I haven't gotten over her yet.. the thought haunts me that she din't respect the relationship even one bit to call it quit in this way for someone else. Please help thanks

Since you will be at a party, be polite and nothing else if you do come face to face with her. You don't have to go up to her. You don't have to talk to her. Hello and excuse yourself to go do something else.

How long ago did the break up happen? What have you done to try to heal and move on?

You have learned a valuable lesson about what you are willing to put up with in a relationship. Hold on the lesson but let the rest go. She isn't worth making yourself feel bad because she doesn't know what she wants.

If you haven't already, get involved in things that help you feel good about yourself. Build up your own self-esteem. It's taken a beating and needs more attention than negative thoughts about her or the past relationship do.

Let it happen naturally. If you don't happen to cross paths, then no need to force a conversation anyway. If you are set up for a conversation, then let the conversation flow naturally. The simple way is to be polite, say hi and keep moving along. But if you want to complicate things, then keep in mind that by continuing a conversation with her can lead to a very awkward party.

Yeah, talk to her and be nice, don't bring up any of the relationship issues. Just have a regular conversation. Also, if you could bring a date with you that would be a huge plus for you. I know that may not be possible on short notice, but having her see you with another girl will definitely give you a confidence boost.

Speak to her if she speaks to you but don't go out of your way to do it.

Don't search her out in the crowd just to speak to her, but don't avoid her if you run into her.

Keep it super simple (Hi, How you doing?), but don't give involved in a lengthy conversation.

I would ignore her, and leave her alone, but be polite when others are around. A party is not the place for ex lover squabbles. Why did you even stay with a female who all she did was cheat on you? She was wrong for sure, but you sure helped a lot by taking her back.

What'd I do is forgo the party altogether and stay NC. But, if you really have to go, ignore her 100% of the time. Even if you two make eye contact and she starts talking to you, walk away and don't say a word. There's a huge risk for an emotional break-down if you start talking to her and then you'll be the buzzkill of the party.

But really, just don't go to the party.

Find a really good woman to bring to the party with you. One of those that makes YOU feel ugly by just being beside her:) That will show that ex of yours.

If the above is not possible, I'd ignore her unless she approaches you. I'd say be nice and polite, but if it were me I'd be snooty. Not out of spite but out of disgust. In fact, I say go with the flow, react hoever it is you react in these situations (which I hope are few and far between). No sense in coaching yourself, see what you feel when approached.

IF you take someone, do so because you want to spend time with that person. Don't do it to play mind games with your ex or use the person as a shield/confidence boost. It isn't fair to the person you take to use her as an emotional shield or to, in effect, make the ex jealous even if she knows that's why you asked her to attend the party with you.

I support ignoring her as much as you can without making the gathering uncomfortable for everyone else.

If she speaks, acknowledge. If she doesn't just have a good time.
Good Luck.