I am in the US Army. I am married but have been separated for 3 years now. I have been paying her $600/mo. Plus full medical coverage. I am ready to move on and I have filed the papers twice but she won't sign them. Please help me with any advise you have. She is only after the money which is making me struggle. What can I do to get her to sign the papers. Every time I file it cost me $300 that I don't have. And she knows this. She is heartless and keeps asking me if I want to keep it a contract merrage. I don't I want out please please please please help me get away from my psycho wife.

Why are you paying her $600 a month? Was that your agreement or was this Court Ordered?

We have a serperation agreement that says I must pay her $600. But Im not really worried about the money anymore I have been paying that for over 2 years. Its like my second rent. I just want to be done with her. We have not been together for 3 years. I am getting older now and I am ready to move on and have a family. She doesn't want to have a fmaily with me. She is with some other guy, where she posts about how much she loves him etc. but I can't use that because when I first got back from Iraq about two years ago(we were not together) I did have sex with one other lady and she found out. That could ruin me in the Army. I wonder if it is to late for her to use that in court. Its really starting to get to me. I can't be with anyone and I can't afford to do anything. The only reason she is dragging it out is because she doesn't want to work and $600 pays her rent. Her boyfriend takes care of the rest.

What papers? Divorce papers?

If you were legally separated, then being with someone else should not cause you a problem.

As for her signing the papers, if she refuses, then ask the court for a default judgment. She can't hang you up forever by refusing the sign.

There is no way around it. My lawyer has tried. I don't care about a legal stand point. Anyting to help get her to sign I will do. I don't want to cause her any harm in any way, but if I have to lie to her or make up some **** I will.

ANY question about law needs to include your general locale as laws vary. But I believe most areas do provide for a default judgment if one party refuses to sign. So where do you live so we can check.

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Originally Posted by mrmalibu

There is no way around it. My lawyer has tried. I dont care about a legal stand point. Anyting to help get her to sign I will do. I dont want to cause her any harm in any way, but if I have to lie to her or make up some **** i will.

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Then your lawyer is a moron. This woman cannot force you to stay married to her. Fire your lawyer and find a new one.

Do not - I repeat, do not - lie to the court. Not only does that make you an uncredible witness, it can also land you in jail.

And who told you that having an affair would "ruin you in the Army"? What does your sex life have to do with your job? I'd love to see a list of the men and women who have been reprimanded by the Army in any way, shape or form for having sex outside of their marriage. If someone else has information to the contrary, I'd be more than happy to read it - there's always room for something new.

I wasn't talking about lying to the court. I was talking about lying to her.

As far as the Army, if my wife calls my commander one more time Im out. She has called him 4 times now, and every time she called she lied to him because she knew it would get me in deep. She is trying to do everything she can to ruin me.

Also, when you are in the Army, you are property of the government.. Does that tell you anything?

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

ANY question about law needs to include your general locale as laws vary. But I believe most areas do provide for a default judgment if one party refuses to sign. So where do you live so we can check.

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Richmond VA

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Originally Posted by mrmalibu

Also, when you are in the Army, you are property of the government.. Does that tell you anything?

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Um... no.

And lying is only going to make the situation worse. Like I already said, get a new attorney. If this guy can't get you a default divorce, he's not doing his job.

From this site:
divorce in Virginia

3. DOES MY SPOUSE HAVE TO AGREE TO THE DIVORCE?

No. You may obtain a divorce regardless of how your spouse feels about it, as long as you, and at least one witness, can testify to the facts, such as the one year separation, which are necessary to establish grounds for divorce.

Sounds like you have been apart for over a year. So yes, fire your attorney, because VA law seems clear.

Also why are you using two IDs?

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

Also why are you using two IDs?

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Oooooohhhh, man... :) Can I ask what the other one is?

Im not. Jumpjump is my neighbor.

So you use her computer? You don't have one of your own?

Why haven't you explained to your commander, that you have been separated from this woman for 2 years and that you have been trying to get a divorce. This should not affect your military service and no, the government doesn't own you.

Troll alert, troll alert...

Even on the 0.000000001% chance that it IS two people who use one computer and two usernames for absolutely no reason, the question has been answered.

Time to close - no point in continuing the drama.

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Originally Posted by mrmalibu

Im not. jumpjump is my neighbor.

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I'm the Easter Bunny. This, are you still helping Santa Claus?

The issues you and jumpjump have posted about are very similar, so we are understandably, very skeptical that you are two different people. Especially when jumpjump answered a question posted to you.

this8384 agrees : No, I got a promotion. Now I work with the Tooth Fairy.


I haven't done a LOT of research but somebody lied to you - that's actually a DEmotion because Santa outranks the Tooth Fairy. Now, I admit the Tooth Fairy provides nicer uniforms but there's less responsibility and no pension plan.