Here is my situation. I am a 21 year old male with a 20 year old female. We have been dating for several months now and from the outside everything appears to be fantastic. When we are together things just click easily, although I have been this way with several woman, it is great being this way with her. Even before we began dating I tried to imagine up what a perfect girlfriend would be for me. A pretty woman but not to pretty, as in to hard to be handled. A submissive woman, a woman with similar interest and a smart woman. However also before we got into this relationship I told myself I wanted to be single for a long time, even after I met her I really only say it as dating for a while, but the more I found out about her the more I was intrigued.

Anyway now to the negative side. First, she is smart but not up to my intellect. I can live with that, she can be taught many things and quite frankly I like to being dominant intellectually. Now to the big negatives, I am a horn-dog. Every time I walk by a girl I think to myself I want to F*** her. With this being said, I have never cheated on a woman nor do I ever plan to. But why am I constantly cursed with these feelings? Is it in every mans blood, or is this a sign of my lack of interest? I have dreams regularly of cheating on her with spontaneous woman. While at the same time I am as happy as a clam while I am with her. Tonight I did the closest thing I have ever done to cheating on a woman. And that is flirt very hard with a bunch of other woman, they all loved it. But I did feel a little dirty once one of my friends confronted me about it. But not to dirty.

Now lastly. Here are the insecure thoughts I have. I deem these thoughts are piggish and selfish and if not for the autonomous bit of this account I would not admit to them to strangers. But I believe they are necessary for a full analysis of my situation. Before we got into the relationship, I always thought I would inevitably break up with her. Then why would I date her in the first place you ask? Because I was desperate. I couldn't **** random girls like I always wanted to. Like all of my friends and even my little brother could do with ease. But now my confidence is getting up and I feel like I can, so my question is should I break up with her. Selfish I know. But lastly... let me say this. Day by day she comes out to be an even better woman to me then the last. And day by day I become more confident with other woman. It's like a constant battle. She is entirely unaware and completely intoxicated by me... Mind you.

Anyway here are my last thoughts. I'm very young, I have strong morals, I love woman, I love the woman I'm with, I'm afraid of the decisions I may make. GOOD ADVICE is strongly appreciated. I have been having these second thoughts for some time now. Nearly a month. What to do? Thanks.

It sounds like you have a good lady but are disturbed by attraction to other women.

Most men I know think along the same lines. Thoughts and fantasies about several different women they encounter in the course of a day.
As long as it stays just thoughts and fantasies , and isn't controlling you or keeping you too distracted to function , I think it's normal or average.

But do be honest in your dealings wiith your currant girl. Honesty is the best way to deal with any situations in any relationship.

I wish you well

Your thoughts don't make you evil, or a bad person, and as long as you stay within the boundaries of good behavior, and treat yourself and others with dignity, and respect, you're good to go.

Thanks for the advice guys.

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Originally Posted by jeanbaby

a perfect girlfriend would be for me. A pretty woman but not to pretty, as in to hard to be handled. A submissive woman, a woman with similar interest and a smart woman.

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Maybe she's just not submissive enough for you :confused:

Let her go, have your fun and let her find a real man to be with.

As long as your actions are pure, stop worrying about your feelings.

You say you want a submissive woman, so that's a huge red flag that says you don't want her to be a partner, but you want to control her. Also your statement about her not being up to your intellect speaks volumes to me. These are just not things that a man in love says.

With that being said, I think you should do her a favor and break off the relationship.