OK some one give me some tips or help please hre my story.

I started dating this girl about 6 months ago, we stayed togheder about 3 weeks then I done something real stupid and we broke up but remain good friends . (She also took away my virginity). Science those 6 months we keep on seeing each other and every time I see her , (were friends right!) she hugs , kisses me, want to have sex, like a couple, but were actully friends. The problem is that the next day, we never speak again , well I want 2 but she doesn't , I really don't know why, when I ask she says you're too stiky to me :cool: anyway. And then we see each other again after like 1 month and it keeps going back and forth what can I do, to get her in to a longlasting relationship. There is a seying ( I'll teach you how you wanan be threated just teach me how) anyway can some one teach me?

Well AOFS,

Well, first thing I'm going to tell you is this is an unhealthy relationship. She uses you as a personal booty call and then drops you when she's done with you. She's a user. She has complete control over you and can make you do what ever she wants at a moments notice.

So, if your going to get this woman, which I would really not recommend but if you are your going to have to listen to what she's saying. When she says your sticky she means you are too attached to her and don't let her have space. So give it to her. Make her work for your attention. When she calls or comes around talk to her for a little bit then excuse yourself. That way you'll take control of the situation and you'll also let her know that your not at her beck and call. If you set up a date, reschedule it for another time. Again showing her your busy. You've got more important things to do. Keep her coming to you.

Ok all that being said, in the end she's going to use you so I recommend not hooking up with this woman.

I said this before but for some reason my post was erased. It sounds like she is using you for sex, and your using each other. The fact is that she only shows up when she wants sex, and you give it to her. So what you need to do is end it. Stop seeing her. There is no long lasting relationship here. All she wants from you is sex, and you want a relationship that she is not willing to give you. I would say that, this is a deal breaker and it is time to end it completely. No sex, no friendship, no contact. Period.

Joe

You are her personal love slave, she doesn't want any other relationship with you.

Trust me from experience, there is no long lasting relationship. Unfortunately I went through the same thing when I was 16. I met this guy after a month (not my boyfriend) we had sex, a few times that week. I fell in love with him, and it was never the same for him. For two years, we would have sex, and then it felt like for a month or two I would chase him, he would be mean, have girlfriends, but I was always his girl on the side, never the main attraction. Finally at the end of two years he was honest with me and told me he didn't love nor did he know if he was capable he said he knew it was the probably the biggest mistake of his life, but since he was finally honest with me I was able to let go. And now we see each other once or twice a year when I need my oil changed... lol... and we show each other pics of our kids.

There are long lasting relationships that do happen. It is a matter of getting together and communicating and becoming friends first. Some people do not experience long lasting but some do.

Joe

Would 15 years and counting be considered a long lasting relationship? Hmmm, yes they are out there.

What I meant came out wrong... I meant no long last relationship when you start in that manner. When the other person isn't as interested as you are.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

You are her personal love slave, she doesn't want any other relationship with you.

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Ditto tal's response.

Afraid that this is the best answer to fit your question. No need to further analyse this one.

I say Move On and forget her.. Hard I know but this is the best option for you under the circumstances.

The problem is that I started fogetting her, she had a new boyfriend and all, but every time I can't forget she keeps on poppin inmy head, I really love her, and she is a good friend too me

Quote:

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Originally Posted by andonefreestyle

the problem is that I started fogetting her, she had a new boyfriend and all, but everytime i can't forget she keeps on poppin inmy head, I really love her, and she is a good friend too me

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One question that you may need to ask yourself.

Are you in love with her or are you in love with the idea of her and this projected image of the connection you think you have with her?

Also.. How could you love a user? Is your love not worth more than that?

But this is not how a good friend acts. The others have hit the nail on the head so to speak. You are her love slave, nothing more.

You may be really in love with the idea of her, but this is not love, this is lust. Plain and simple, lust.

This is not how 2 people show their love for each other.

Time to move on to a healthy relationship. This one is doomed.

J9 picks up on a very good point. Plain and simple, you are most likely in love with the idea of her.

There is a big difference between love and lust.

What you have/had in no way reflects love.. I know you must be thinking 'what do you know?' and 'who are you to tell me how I feel?'

Well, I know the difference between love and lust and I have experienced both.

With love, you can let that person go because you want them to be happy and you want what is best for them. You place their interests before your own even if this means that you are forced to make sacrifices, even losing them.

Lust is far different and is more based on sexual desire rather than intense feelings for another person. Lust can also fool you into thinking you are in love when actually you could not be further from the truth.

You will realise this when you find someone you experience true love with and I hope you find that special person. Perhaps you will find more than one special woman that values you for who you really are. I believe that we can be in love with more than one person in our lifetime.

I just think it is best for you to move on from her, cut contact, keep busy and get over her. If you choose not to, your feelings will get out of control and Yes, with lust there are still feelings but these feelings usually derive from sexual jealousy and it is quite unhealthy.

And most importantly... DON'T BE USED LIKE THIS

Value Yourself as much as you Value Others..

Another thing..

Maybe forget about women for a while and just focus on you..

Give yourself some ME time and I am sure things will be put into perspective for you.

All the best.

I don't think you're going to get this one into a long-lasting relationship. You are her plan B, for when she has nothing better to do. She's basically told you that you're too needy and clingy. From the tome of your post I'd tend to agree. Back off and don't pursue. See each other occasionally like you've been doing without pushing or pressuring her. Have fun but be careful. Get busy with a life of your own. Essentially treat her like your plan B, the same way she's doing with you.

Like everyone here has been telling you, you are being used. And unless you enjoy being used, leave her alone. Tell her that you are done being used by her and to leave you alone. Don't keep being used by someone who obviously does not care enough to talk to you the day after you have sex. By the way, she does not want to be in a long-lasting relationship with you like you do. If she did, she would've a long time ago. You deserve MUCH better. Good luck.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by andonefreestyle

ok some one give me some tips or help please hre my story.

I started dating this girl about 6 months ago, we stayed togheder about 3 weeks then I done something real stupid and we broke up but remain good friends . (She also took away my virginity). Science those 6 months we keep on seeing each other and everytime I see her , (were friends right!) she hugs , kisses me, wanna have sex, like a couple, but were actully friends. The problem is that the next day, we never speak again , well i want 2 but she doesnt , i really dont know why, when I ask she says you're too stiky to me :cool: anyway. and then we see each other again after like 1 month and it keeps going back and forth what can i do, to get her in to a longlasting relationship. there is a seying ( I'll teach you how you wanan be threated just teach me how) anyway can some one teach me??

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Well, ignore the part about sex and tell her you want to hang out. You can go out to the mall and walk around and if she keeps hinting about sex let her know what you want. She is definatley letting you know her wishes. Fair game. What is good for one is good for the other. Also sounds like she is getting you back for dumping her and she can hurt you with the sex part. You may also tell her, she is treating herself like a loose girl. If she calls you or sees you and wants sex, tell her you don't want a loose girl in a uncommitted relationship. You can have sex with a stranger in a bar.

How can she be a good friend if all she wants you for is sex? Time to move on, but if you continue with this girl. All it will ever be about is the sex. Maybe you love the idea about the sex and do not want that to go away eighter? Sex does not make a friendship, and sex does not make a relationship and sex does not create love.

Joe