I found out 3 months ago that my 25 year old daughter who has a 2 year old was using herion. Her father and I have been divorced 16 years and he is a meth addict. He has pretty much been an absent father.She now lives with him his mother his sister and will have nothing to do with me. She lived with me I supported her and was there when my grandaughter was born. I haven't even been able to see the baby. Why am I at blame when I was always here for her?

Its easier to blame someone else instead of having to admit making bad choices and decisions and deal with them,blaming you gives her a sense of 'its not my fault',which of course it is.

Living with people who are in a similar situation does not really help,as they may enable each other and never completely take responsibility for their actions.

For all that we do as parents, at some stage we have to let go and let our children be who they are,it may take 30 or 40 years for them to 'come good' as my own mother says.

By 'come good' she means grow up!

You have done your part now she has to do hers.

If you are concerned about the baby,perhaps there is another relative who could check in and make sure the baby is OK.

I'm sure she's only with dad because right now they have so much in common.

A lot of drug addicts blame someone else for their own poor decisions, so don't allow her to make you feel guilty for something that's not your fault.

I would be more concerned with the 2 year old being brought up in that household. I think I'd express some concern to someone that can check in on the family situation, even if you have to get Children's Services involved. The little one really has to be your first concern.