I was with my ex for about 2 years, We broke up September last year because he felt like it wasn't working.
Last week he drove to my house (which is an hour + half or so from his) and posted a letter to me by himself.
He initially wanted to get into contact with me, which is great because I've still got feelings for him even though we haven't spoken in a year and he feels the same in return.
I was upset a few days ago, so I text him asking him if it's possible to come over, I explained that I understood I was asking for a lot, but regardless, he drove to me again.
We spoke for hours and when he had to leave he cried because he didn't want to and because he's so sorry that he hurt me. All night he was being close to me, cuddling me, and showing affection (not kissing.. That happened as he left)
He also claimed that every other girl he's seen or somewhat been with, he didn't feel the same as he did with me. He said that he still felt empty with them, and he felt truly loved and cared about when he was with me. As well as that, he said that in the time we've been apart he's realized what he lost and he's very sorry for it.
He's been sweet to me, but he's started avoiding flirting and sweet talk recently because he want's to be on his own for a while longer (as do I) so I understand that. But what I don't understand is when he told me he didn't want me to get my hopes up, he says he loves me, and I know he does, he still claims he doesn't regret talking sweet talk, but he says if he does make to decision to be with me again he wants to make sure that he absolutely definitely sure that he doesn't hurt me again.

I don't really know what to do. I'm just confused.

I hate a fence sitter who just can't commit. Why bother with him Hit if he can't just be mature enough to say yes or no. I wouldn't bother with these games. Find someone else who can truly communicate his feelings for you and say he wants to be with you.

Tick

It's not a slight love problem... it's a huge red flag. You're in for another ride, with more confusion, heartache and pain. Don't let the same dog bite you twice. He hurt you, broke up with you, dated others, and now he loves you? And it took him a full year to realize? Cut him off, you deserve better. He doesn't know what he wants, but while he'll be figuring himself out, you'll be hurt all over again.

Don't be confused by him. If after a year he still can't make up his mind about you and him, then probably he never will.

He is definitely not worth waiting for.

Don't allow him to hurt you again. I have to agree that it's not a little love problem, but is that giant red flag!

He's had a year to miss you, want you back, and think about loving you and if he hasn't been able to truly get it together in that period, it just ain't going to happen.

I guess the plus side is, while the two of you were apart for a year, he dated others and realized that you were like no other. I presume you feel the same way. Maybe the year apart was a good thing, and once you connected with each other again, there was still love there.

But, what doesn't balance here to me is, what was it that caused the breakup in the first place. Did he cheat, or you? It must have been something major. What was it, and if you can explain a little about why it caused the breakup, and do you think that his hesitation is truly that he doesn't want history to repeat itself?

Hard to tell what his motives are. At least during the past year, he's been thinking, and who's to say that he isn't sincere, just cautious.

Hard to say with what you have said so far.