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-   -   To pursue or not to pursue? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=501238)

  • Aug 24, 2010, 12:13 AM
    pixiegurl
    To pursue or not to pursue?
    There is a guy that I can't stop thinking about. We have become friends through one of my best friends, however, the catch to the story is that she has been in an on-again and off-again relationship with him for two years and it ended only about 5 months ago. She is still quite protective of him, and she absolutely hates it when he meets new people or when he and I talk and hang out when she isn't around. I think I am starting to develop feelings for this guy, and I am not sure what to do about it because I know he doesn't have feelings for her but she may still have feelings for him. She is quite close friends with his family, particularly his mum and sister. I can't stop thinking about him, and I would never pursue anything without being upfront with her first- but am I at risk of losing my friendship if I tell her that I have feelings for this guy? I am not even sure if he feels the same way about me, because I would never ask him as I am scared that my friend will not be happy about it. Any suggestions of what I can do?
  • Aug 24, 2010, 12:48 AM
    411Help

    Your best friend's EX is off limits.

    Be a good friend. Find another guy.
  • Aug 24, 2010, 03:28 AM
    kaka67

    They've been on and off for two years?

    And you want to get involved with him?

    He obviously doesn't know how to act in a mature relationship. Red flag is flapping in your face big time.
  • Aug 24, 2010, 04:49 AM
    talaniman

    That's moving rather fast for someone who just ended a long term relationship. Why even take a chance like that when you don't even know how the guy feels about you?

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...er-480597.html

    I think you enjoy your friendships for what they are, and not get carried away by your feelings, when you have so little facts to go on.

    Why ruin two friendships?
  • Aug 24, 2010, 05:12 AM
    adam_89

    Isn't it a rule that you can't date anybody that you best friends have dated? I thought that was in the handbook. Anyway, he don't seem stable anyway, so take it easy and you will find a good guy when you are ready.
  • Aug 24, 2010, 05:47 AM
    pixiegurl

    Thanks everyone... You have all been a big help!
  • Aug 24, 2010, 05:50 AM
    adam_89

    At your service.

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