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-   -   Is my husband bi-sexual? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=500850)

  • Aug 23, 2010, 12:44 AM
    missmel7699
    Is my husband bi-sexual?
    My husband said he would have rather been a woman in front of his son and my daughter. He went on and on about this for at least an hour and even brought up the fact of multiple orgasms in front of the kids. This is when I told him to shut up! His friend asked him about the comment he made to me and again my husband replied, "have you never thought about being a woman". His friend instantly replied" I can honestly say I have never thought that". He works with an asst. chaplain and the asst. came to our apartment and told my husband " you did me wrong baby". After my husband did not provide the beverage he wanted. They are very suspicious and after the guy said that, I instantly got sick!
  • Aug 23, 2010, 01:09 AM
    saranghabnida

    This does not necessarily means he is bisexual. A lot of people experience the thought of being with the same sex. It is proven that Women and Men are very similar besides the difference in anatomy. But he may just be curious about being a women. Sometimes I question myself about being a guy? Does that make me Bisexual? No it does not. It means I am curious. Maybe you should talk to him and get into a conversation about this.

    Since he is your husband and he brought this up in front of the children, you should really sit him down and talk to him about how you feel about what he said.

    Go from there.
    Take your time.
    It could be curiosity.
  • Aug 23, 2010, 02:13 AM
    pipstik

    Speak to him about what he should and what he should not say in front of the children. As for the being a woman part.. it can be a curiosity.. but that does not mean that he should be voicing such weird curiosity in front of the children.
  • Aug 23, 2010, 06:27 AM
    Cat1864

    How old are the children and what brought the subject up? Was alcohol involved in the conversation?

    It is quite common for one gender to think about being the opposite one. Curiosity, envy/jealousy of what the person sees as the 'perks' enjoyed by the other sex are just two reasons. Usually, the person only sees the upside and ignores the not as desirable aspects. For males, multiple orgasms are a wonder, but they don't think of the greater percentage of women who need help achieving even one. Women have their own curiosity about males.

    The comment by his co-worker could be an inside joke from work. Friends and co-workers have things happen that become running gags that make no sense to anyone but those who were there just like couples and families do.

    Talk with him. Let him know you have concerns and listen to what he says with an open mind instead of a preconceived idea of what you think he means. If you don't quite understand his points, ask him to clarify what he means. Jumping from conclusion to conclusion will only frustrate, confuse and mentally (if not emotionally) exhaust you.
  • Aug 23, 2010, 07:07 AM
    Jake2008
    I would say his rant, in front of the children (how old are they?) was extremely boorish, to say the least. Cornering an audience for over an hour to rant about wanting to be a woman, and backing it up with reasons, to children- I'd say he's got some serious issues.

    That you allowed him to rant in front of children about his theories on being a woman, right down to multiple orgasms, makes me wonder about your ability to recognize behaviour that is having a direct, negative, and confusing effect on your children. Why you didn't stop him after 2 minutes and instead allowed this to continue for over an hour, is beyond what any sensible, responsible person would do- because there were children who were directly subjected to his behaviour.

    What were you thinking. He should not need to be told and/or corrected on his behaviour- big red flags, and huge alarm bells should have gone off- because there were children present.

    The big question to me, other than him ranting about wanting to be a woman, and you allowing this to continue in front of children, is, why do you think he is also bisexual. Is it the remark by the co-worker? Is that all the 'proof' you have to back up your sispicion that he is bi?

    Is there a history here with his sexuality, and how you have suddenly become concerned?

    Whatever or whoever he is, to me, in my opinion, is secondary to the fact that that the nature of his rant, and your inability or choice not to stop him because it was inappropriate (to say the least) to dump on children, bothers me far more than his sexuality.

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