Ask Me Help Desk - I'm 18 but she's 16, can I go to jail?

Ok, here's the deal. I'm 18 years old and my girlfriend is 16. We're head over hills in love with one another. She's MUCH more mature than most 16 year olds, BUT her parents hate me. They've only met me once and I SWEAR I was just as polite as can be. They have NO right to dislike me. I'm actually beginning to think it's because they're loaded with money and I live in a trailer. But for whatever the reason, they don't want their daughter to date me. Actually, they don't even want her to be in contact with me. We've NEVER been alone together, never even kissed. My question is... is there any type of legal action her parents can take to keep us from seeing one another?

They Can Get A Restraining Order.

I am no lawyer but I do not think any court would issue a restraining order on the basis of " I don't like him"

Where do you live?

Why do they not like you?

Maybe the money is the reason.

Another possible reason is they just don't want their 16 year old daughter dating ANYONE, especially a boy who is 2 years older.

As for the legal action…

There is no legal action they can really take to stop you from dating.

Well, they could pick up and move somewhere.

That would stop your dating.

They could take away her phone, computer, car.

And if you 2 have sex, it MIGHT be statutory rape, DEPENDING on where you live.

If in Canada, it is NOT, since she is over the age of 14.

Yes a lot depends on where you live,

There is a possibility , and yes esp if they have money, since the DA often listens to richer people better, esp if you live in smaller areas.
That they can look at not the age of consent but that you are a adult and the girl is a minor, so you could be looked at for aiding in the deliquecy of a minor.

But they can stop you from seeing her but stoping her, she has to do what they say, since she is a minor and they are the parents. If you take her somewhere against their will, you also have some issues about "custody" "kidnapping" since you are taking a minor somewhere against the consent of the parents.

So "sex" is not always the way parents can get rid of a older boy.

** my boys where the boys and I know perosnally many of the ways the girl parents can cause pain if they want to. Lucky for my boys we had money also, so we could afford a good lawyer for them, had we been poor with a public defender most likely they would have done time

Quote:

Originally Posted by OpenYourMindPlz

Ok, here's the deal. I'm 18 years old and my girlfriend is 16. We're head over hills in love with one another. She's MUCH more mature than most 16 year olds, BUT her parents hate me. They've only met me once and I SWEAR I was just as polite as can be. They have NO right to dislike me. I'm actually beginning to think it's because they're loaded with money and I live in a trailer. But for whatever the reason, they don't want their daughter to date me. Actually, they don't even want her to be in contact with me. We've NEVER been alone together, never even kissed. My question is... is there any type of legal action her parents can take to keep us from seeing one another?

Always be in a public place with her. A library, fast food place, don't pick her up in your car sit in a public park, if you are at a friends house together make sure there is a parent close by. Don't take her to the friends house , its OK for her to go over there . Hang in there till she's at least 17.

They can ask for a restraining order. I don't know if her age would tip the scales as far as deciding whether to grant it. Normally a judge would only grant a restraining order if the petitioner can show that the adversarial party poses a danger to the petitioner. That means her parents would have to show that you are a danger to their daughter and/or them.

Its unlikely they can get a legal order barring you from seeing her in public. Especially if you have done nothing to harm her. They can, of course deny you access to their house, block your calls, etc.

I would bide my time. See here when you can, correspond with her as much as you can. Once she is 18 she can do what she wants. If your affections are that strong, they can wait 2 more years.

Quote:

Originally Posted by OpenYourMindPlz

Ok, here's the deal. I'm 18 years old and my girlfriend is 16. We're head over hills in love with one another. She's MUCH more mature than most 16 year olds, BUT her parents hate me. They've only met me once and I SWEAR I was just as polite as can be. They have NO right to dislike me. I'm actually beginning to think it's because they're loaded with money and I live in a trailer. But for whatever the reason, they don't want their daughter to date me. Actually, they don't even want her to be in contact with me. We've NEVER been alone together, never even kissed. My question is... is there any type of legal action her parents can take to keep us from seeing one another?

Your girlfriend is a minor and is subject to her parents rules. But aside from that, they can forbid her to see you but for them to put you in jail or to get a restraining order, they need to show cause and have evidence that you have endangered her or abused her.
Her parents are concerned and rightly so. In this day and age with so much in the news and other media about the violence against females of all ages, its easy to understand. As I am a parent myself.
Take the time to sit down with them, your girlfriend and include your parents in the discussion. Having someone there for you will not make everyhting seem one sided and off balance. State your intentions toward their daughter. They have the right to set up ground rules in regards to her dating you or anyone else. They will need to be respected. If you do it this way everything is out in th open and no surprises around the corner.
I agree with the other posters. Take things slow. You're both young and have a futures to look forward to. Don't do anything stupid or fool hardy to put that in jeopardy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by OpenYourMindPlz

Ok, here's the deal. I'm 18 years old and my girlfriend is 16. We're head over hills in love with one another. She's MUCH more mature than most 16 year olds, BUT her parents hate me. They've only met me once and I SWEAR I was just as polite as can be. They have NO right to dislike me. I'm actually beginning to think it's because they're loaded with money and I live in a trailer. But for whatever the reason, they don't want their daughter to date me. Actually, they don't even want her to be in contact with me. We've NEVER been alone together, never even kissed. My question is... is there any type of legal action her parents can take to keep us from seeing one another?

It depends on the state you are in. But in most cases, with 18 to 16 you will be OK. For example, 16 is legal in CT. NY has a sliding scale where it is the difference of the age of the people involved when they are both young.

Quote:

Originally Posted by shygrneyzs

Poor you - her parents do not like you. Can you ever imagine why? That is their daughter! She is a minor! You are an adult! I don't think money or living in a trailer has much to do with it. They are being protective of their child. Don't make this a poor versus the rich. As a parent, I would have strong reservations about my 16 year old daughter dating an 18 yr old guy.

You got to be kidding me. You act as if he is 25 and she is 14. For all you know the difference in their ages could be 13 months. Have you ever been to a high school? Do you think that it is uncommon for Seniors to date sophomores? Heck, I am not that far out of high school, and out of the 20 or so girls I dated during school, I would say at least 50% of them were a year younger than me or more. These are two high school age kids dating just like every other set of high school kids. There is nothing immoral about dating a 16 year old when you are 18.

Not to mention that he came in hear asking a LEGAL question. If you want to preach to someone about your personal beliefs, I'm sure there are forums on religion, relationships, families, etc. to do it in.

Sadly it appears the poster will not come back with any more info, esp like where he lives,

That is the big issue, in many states 16 is the age of consent, in others it is not.

It is so tiring when you ask them to clarify and it appears they don't come back and give any more info

Assuming if the poster is in the united states, then yes it is illegal if you have sex with her. Age of Consent varies, and 14 is under the age of consent in any state(again, assuming you live in the US).

If her parents found out you had sex with there daughter, and given they "don't like you", they could easily call the police on you, and any confession from the daughter that would indicate you did something can and most likely would result in a sexual assault charge, or a statutory rape charge, and jail time.

It is statutory rape.. if u have sent explicit emails or text or even if they recorded phone conversations, you could get in trouble. Because you know she is young. Even if anything does happen between you all, and both agree with what you are doing, it is still rape in the eyes of the law. Watch court t.v. the sent many people to jail for emailing young girls "dirty" emails. So don't put anything past the law or her not willing to like you parents.

Quote:

Originally Posted by starsbooty

it is statutory rape.. if u have sent explicit emails or text or even if they recorded phone conversations, you could get in trouble. because you know she is young. even if anything does happen between you all, and both agree with what you are doing, it is still rape in the eyes of the law. watch court t.v. the sent many people to jail for emailing young girls "dirty" emails. so dont put anything past the law or her not willing to like you parents.

With all due respect starsbooty, you have absolutely no idea what you are talking about, I think it would be best if you refrained from guessing at what the law is, or relying on what you have seen on Law & Order to give legal advice. People come to this site for accurate information, you aren't helping anyone by guessing or relaying the "expertise" you have gained by watching a lot of TV court shows.

I am trying to write this in the least condescending manner possible, but it is tough when you are giving advice that 100% incorrect and further completely butchering the meaning of every legal term you include in your posts. We won't likely be able to assist this young man until he tells us what stats he is in, but a few things regarding your latest debacle.

1. You use the term "statutory rape". There are two parts to this term. "Statutory" means "defined by statute". The writer explained that he was 18 and his girlfriend was 16. For you to say with certainty "it is statutory rape" is completely irresponsible for two reasons:

(A) Statutory rape is defined and enforced through STATE LAW. Every state has different sets of laws. Therefore, it would be impossible to assess his situation without knowing where he is from.

(B) It is my belief, based on my knowledge of the laws in several different states (from having studied them... not hearing Judge Whoppner talk about them) that it is more likely than not that this would not be statutory rape, even if they were having sex.(which the writer clearly stated they were not).

Further, every definition of "rape" that I have ever seen includes a necessary element of penetration. It is rather ridiculous to suggest that sending a text message could be considered "rape".

2. It is true that many people have been sent to jail for e-mailing or having explicit chat with young girls over the internet. Although I have no expertise in the particular criminal field, I can tell you with 100% certainty that these guys didn't go to jail charged with rape unless there was a physical touching. In the absence of physical contact, they were likely charged with something like "endangering the welfare of a child", etc.

As I have said in many posts on this site. The law forum is not a place to come and "shoot from the hip". There are many forums where you can go and offer an opinion having no expertise at all. For example, if I went to the Home improvement forum and wanted to know what color to paint my bathroom walls... I would have no problem with you suggesting Lavender, even though you are probably not a decorating expert. A worng choice in that regard isn't going to ruin my life, or land me in jail.

The problem with the law forum is that many people coming on here in search of help are in a dire situation and/or a situation where the advice given will significantly affect their lives, to the extent that erroneous information could be very damaging. When you make an erroneous statement, and present it as if it is an absolute certainty, that is a problem. (this is not to say that I would advise anyone to rely solely on advice from an internet forum when making important decisions, but sadly, some will do so).

There are many non-lawyers on the law forum who give worthwhile advice to people based on certain experiences, or exposure to the law. If you read the posts they make, you will see a common denominator... a concession that what they are saying may not be the absolute 100% correct truth, and advice on where to find a 100% correct answer.

I don't speak from any legal experience but having gone to court to testify in domestic abuse and sexual asault cases, I have seen restraining orders denied even with evidence let alone with the parents saying they feel the male is a treat to their daughter. Much less that they don't like him. Age doesn't matter. How many teenage girls are often abused by their "highschool" boyfriends? Without any real evidence the tro can be denied. Often resulting in worse case senerio. I don't get my info from law and order (but do watch forenzic files) but from being there and seeing what happens.

Beside I feel (a mother's gut instinct) there is more to this than that's being told. The red flag to me is "they have no right to hate me."