Ask Me Help Desk - Right or wrong

I'm 27f and my hubby is 30m, we both satisfied each other on bed but sometimes I face certain problems from him

1) During sex, he start taking my friends names or my sister names very enthusiastically that I feel bad about him

2) Sometimes, he insist me to suck but I don't like it and he gets angry

3) Sometimes, he push into my anus which is very painful but he wants to enjoy with this also

4) He always find my G Spot and till now, we are not been able to locate it.
Can any one please tell where is G Spot and how to get orgasm out of it

It is right or wrong ?

How long have you been married?

When not expecting sex, have you tried talking with him about your concerns?

Have you told him how it makes you feel when he says other women's names while making love to you? How would he feel if you said other men's names?

How often is 'sometimes'?

Does he give you oral sex? Do you have any objections to giving him oral sex that might be overcome if he used patience and understanding? Things like washing or letting you proceed at your own pace?

Anal sex is NOT something that should be tried/done if one of the individuals is not ready. While it can be pleasurable if proper preparations are made (relaxing, stretching, lubrication, etc.), it is not something you make your partner accept. Forcing it is extremely wrong and physically damaging.

Are you asking about orgasm through intercourse in general or about the mythical spot that is supposed to cause orgasms? In general, it is common for women to need help having an orgasm through intercourse. Fingers or a toy used on the clitoris can give added stimulation to help you climax. The G-spot is supposed to be a place inside the vagina that can give pleasure when pressed correctly. (G-Spot - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia).

Frankly, you should be enjoying the journey together. The biggest erogenous zone on a woman IF he cares to know is her mind. It sounds like he is ignoring that part.

Right or wrong is what a couple has to decide for themselves by communicating the needs, desires, likes and dislikes of each individual and compromising where necessary. 'Forcing' a partner through actions or coercion to do what the other partner wants is WRONG. It should be a mutual decision for mutual pleasure.

Sure... Ask the easy questions. :-)

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

1) During sex, he start taking my friends names or my sister names very enthusiastically that i feel bad about him

It is normal for a man to fantasize. Sometimes while he is having sex with you. I would only be worried if there were other signs of infidelity. I don't think he is cheating. I think he is just fantasizing about the other women.

In my opinion that is just fine. Sometimes it gives love making a little kick.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

2) Sometimes, he insist me to suck but i dont like it and he gets angry

Either blow jobs are right off the menu, or he needs to provide first. IE he needs to go down and pleasure you before you go down on him. If he is unwilling than blow jobs are right out.

You need to talk to him, when you're not having sex, about this. This is going to be something I will emphasise.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

3) Sometimes, he push into my anus which is very painful but he wants to enjoy with this also

Push him off immediately! The chances are about 50/50 that he is doing this by accident. Tell him this is a no go. Unless you like it. If you do, than lube is your friend. Pick up some anal lube specifically and make sure he uses a condom.

Communicate to him that you don't like anal play.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

4) He always find my G Spot and till now, we are not been able to locate it.
can any one please tell where is G Spot and how to get orgasm out of it

This is a question that has baffled people since the damn of time. Some people have it, some people don't. If you have it than it shouldn't be hard to located. There is also some speculation that a woman needs to be turned on and turned on well for the g-spot to be sensitive.

Anyhow, if you're laying on your back, put one or to fingers in your vagina and curl your fingers up. It should be just on the far side of your Vagina. NSFW LINK

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

It is right or wrong ?

Your husband is making sexually demands on you that you're not comfortable with. That is wrong. You're not communicating your displeasure or distaste for said sexual demands. That is wrong.

You need to talk to him in a non-confrontational manner about what you want, need, and don't like in the bedroom.

Good Luck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

1) During sex, he start taking my friends names or my sister names very enthusiastically that i feel bad about him

Not wrong, just awkward.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

2) Sometimes, he insist me to suck but i dont like it and he gets angry

Wrong.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

3) Sometimes, he push into my anus which is very painful but he wants to enjoy with this also

Totally wrong

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinathakur

4) He always find my G Spot and till now, we are not been able to locate it.
can any one please tell where is G Spot and how to get orgasm out of it

There's millions of manuals floating around on the internet.

He shouldn't be insisting you do anything. He should be discussing with you what he would like and listening to how you feel about it so that you can work on things together in a way that you both feel happy about.

Try talking to him outside the bedroom, when he's not horny and maybe frustrated, about how this makes you feel.

Thanks for your replies

@CravenMorhead
We got married in 2006 and it was always painful from the day1 . I want to enjoy sex properly but when I try 2 enjoy, I can't enjoy that much. When my husband gives me more energetic strokes, it makes me more painful. I can only enjoy the slow strokes, I don't know why

And sometimes means, 6/10 , he fantasize about my friends and sister. And when I say him about his friends, he doesn't say anything , he says OK no problem.
We love each other very much but as I doesn't know much tips 2 satisfy my husband, he feels disappointed. Even I feel bad that I couldn't make him happy with sex
Should I consult doctor?

There's a lot of focus here on how you can make him happy with sex. What about you? Does he take time to find out what makes you aroused and make sure that you are? Sex will be painful if you are not adequately lubricated or possibly if you are tense.

Only thing I will add to what has already been said, is that while he may think about these other women during sex, he doesn't need to be saying their names out loud or telling you about it.

The other thing is that you mentioned you prefer the slower strokes, make sure he knows this. Let him know you need more time to warm up and he needs to slow down a bit. Some men, in an effort to bring a woman to orgasm, think they need to go faster and faster, but that is not always the case.

Talk about this outside of the bedroom, but also experiment pleasing each other in a slow pace in the bedroom and letting him know what feels good to you, when you need things slower, and when you may want things to move faster.

I am wondering what is this man thinking.

He forces himself on you, knowing it causes you pain. He feels quite all right about doing whatever he likes to you, regardless of your needs, and your feelings. This doesn't sound like a very loving, thoughtful man to me, it sounds like forced sex from a man who can't go to the trouble of looking past his own needs, to his wife who is suffering because of them.

And you think you need a Doctor?

I can't ever remember a time where my husband would dare to say another woman's name during lovemaking. I can tell you, the sex would end right then and there. Any forced sex, marital or not, is criminal. Can't surgar coat that. If you say 'no' and he does it anyway- what do you call that. Lovemaking?

After five years, and sex is still painful, uncomfortable, and forced upon you, it is time to really evaluate your needs, and find a way to have them met. Marriage counselling might help you to express to an impartial third party what you have said here. If he hears from a counsellor what you have been saying for five years, perhaps he will change his behaviour.

Just my opinion here of course, he's your husband, but to me he sounds like an immature brute who could use some help in realizing that it is not okay to have his sexual needs met, at the comfort and expense of his partner.

These are not minor problems in my opinion. If he is this forceful in the bedroom, what is he like to live with day to day.

Painful sex, forced anal sex, calling out other women's names (appears to have happened more than once) , attempting to force oral sex - and he loves her "very much."

Not in the US, I'm afraid, unless you're a battered woman.

If I EVER yelled out someone else's name during sex I would bite my own tongue off!

Unfortunately other cultures don't recognize men and women as equals.culturely acceptable,morally wrong.speak up if you can without repercussions.