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-   -   My boyfriend only wants sex once a week is that normal (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=497761)

  • Aug 13, 2010, 06:35 AM
    angels_cove34
    My boyfriend only wants sex once a week is that normal
    Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost a year... I'm a type of person that has a really high sex drive but he just doesn't seem to be. I know he loves me because he likes to hug and snuggle and kiss me, but he only seems to be into sex about once a week. Nothing has really changed since we started dating it has always been like this, but is this normal? Most guys want it at least every other day. He did mention once that one of his ex girlfriends told him that she felt like that was all they ever did. Did this mess him up? Is something else wrong? I really don't think he's cheating I just don't get it.
  • Aug 13, 2010, 06:38 AM
    smoothy

    How old are you both. Ages can be a large fator.
  • Aug 13, 2010, 06:42 AM
    angels_cove34

    I'm 35 he is 30 he works really hard like 6 days a week out in the heat and I know he is tired... maybe I should be more aggressive I usually just let him go to sleep and don't push it. I just wander if something might be medically wrong or if low sex drive is normal for a guy.
  • Aug 13, 2010, 06:59 AM
    smoothy

    OK... That helps a lot... 6 days physical labor outdoors in the heat WILL take the Horny right out of him. Now on the medical end... yes there are things that can contribute there as well, does he get annual physicals and blood tests, untreated High blood pressure or diabetes can do this... and a who array of medications can have that as a side effect as well.

    Now as far as is that drive normal... nope... its low BUT that is without considering other factors.

    I'm 49, I'd be climbing the walls after 3 days much less a week.
  • Aug 13, 2010, 07:07 AM
    martinizing2
    Normal is relative to the person.
    For some, normal is wanting sex daily or more.
    And others having sex 2 or 3 times a month is normal.
    And these are all subject to change if the person is tired, stressed, distracted or any of many reasons.

    If he has always been like this, he will probably remain like he his.

    Try some good old communication. Ask him what gets his motor running.
    Try role playing , or porn or whatever the two of you find that may help.
    Maybe if he understands you feel frustrated with the frequency , he may give it more effort.

    Communication is always a good place to start.

    I wish you well
  • Aug 13, 2010, 09:52 AM
    Cat1864
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by angels_cove34 View Post
    i'm 35 he is 30 he works really hard like 6 days a week out in the heat and i know he is tired...maybe i should be more agressive i usually just let him go to sleep and don't push it. I just wander if something might be medically wrong or if low sex drive is normal for a guy.

    Has this been his work schedule since you met him? Has he had any vacation time where he seemed to want more intercourse?

    Wanting more and being physically capable of more are two very different things. Due to his work schedule he may also be conditioned to having sex once a week.

    Do you live together? Would he be more willing/able first thing in the morning instead of last thing at night?

    Is he starting to feel like the only reason you are with him is for sex?

    Put yourself on the other side: If you were working six days a week and extremely tired, realistically how much effort would you want to put into sex? How would you feel if he were demanding (being more aggressive) sex when you just were exhausted?

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