I came across this forum by accident and decided to join in hopes that someone out there is either experiencing the same thing I am experiencing or has heard of something similar. I am 28 years old and married to an amazing man who is understanding, very calm and collective. My life sounds great, however I suffer from severe anxiety and anger issues. It's gotten to a point where my husband is no longer willing to put up with me if I don't get some help or diagnosed.

I can be very happy one minute and feel like I'm on top of the world and it only takes one thing to set me off. In my state of rage I lose all sense of reality and logic. I break things and yell at my husband and blame him for things he cannot change. I realize I have a problem and I am willing to get some help. Guess my main issue is I'm afraid of having some doctor put me on medication. My grandpa committed suicide a couple of years ago after he stopped taking his meds for manic depression. I have never ever been suicidal however I don't ever want to end up like him. I know there is definitely something wrong with me. It isn't normal for me to become so upset over stupid things.
I wanted to post this and see if anyone out there is experiencing the same thing I am or has experienced this before. Whether you have this problem, had this problem or live with someone with this problem. What did you do to fix it? How are you coping if you live with someone with this issue? I realize that if I don't fix this my marriage will end and I will never be happy or make anyone happy. I love my husband very much and he does not deserve this at all. I need help. I am calling my doctor tomorrow and hopefully the doc can refer me to someone that can help. Thank you all for reading...

I moved your question to Mental Health.

One major thought to remember is that you are not your grandfather.

How long have you been dealing with these mood swings? You really do need to see a doctor and discover what is causing you to act like you are. It could be bi-polar or one of several other problems.

Getting a proper diagnosis is the first step. Fear and stress are probably making things worse so take care of the uncertainty of what is wrong. Then you can work on fixing the problem.

Thank you so much for responding. I have been dealing with these mood swings for a few years now but it seems as though they have gotten worse these last couple of years. I am a very happy cheerful person around everyone else but it seems as though my outburst only happen behind closed doors. It only takes a small thing to set me off.

Lately I have been dealing with a lot of stress and that is definitely a contributing factor to my outbursts. I recently found out that mother in-law whom I thought loved me was actually bad mouthing me to others. Most of my arguments with my husband are because of his mother. If the mention of her is ever brought up I tend to become angry and have these episodes of rage. My husband mentioned to me that it's like walking on eggshells with me and he's always afraid of what I'm going to break next if he says the wrong thing. I know I need help but I guess up until I was afraid to admit that I do have a problem.

If there are problems with your mother-in-law as well as possible medical issues, you may want to look into marriage counseling, too. It could give you and your husband a safe place to discuss marital problems and less confrontational ways to handle them when you are in private.

I am in such a similar situation to you! I joined to get some advice on how I can get my boyfriend of 21 months back after he left me due to my issues. I just get so angry at stupid things to the extent that I frighten myself and him! I never know what I'm going to do when I'm like this... I break things, throw things, scream shout and, I'm ashamed to say, have even hit him a few times. It doesn't feel like me when I'm doing these things and I don't know what to do! I went to my GP and they referred me to a counselling service. So far I have attended 3 sessions and it has given me a lot of insight into why I do the things I do. I hope that my boyfriend sees that I have/ am changing and that our relationship will be good again now I have admitted I have a problem and am seeking help. Its good to know I'm not the only one with these issues... I feel like I'm crazy!

Go to your GP... keep us updated on what they say. :)

Hello to those who responded to my previous post. I finally saw a psychiatrist about my episodes of rage, anxiety and little bit of depression. After speaking to him for several sessions he was finally able to declare that I do in fact have Bipolar Disorder Type II. I was placed on Depakote. I was also advised that I join an anxiety and anger management course. I have only attended one class so it's too early for me to see any changes. As far as the medication I am currently taking, I am not seeing any drastic changes as I still feel moments of anger and rage; however I have found that I am able to think twice before breaking anything or punching my husband. I would say that it is in fact working just a tiny bit.

I am going to see my psychiatrist again later next month and at that time he will place me on a higher dose of Depakote. I really hope that it will curve my mood swings. One thing I've noticed is that I am now having a harder time sleeping. I was having trouble sleeping before but it seems as though it's gotten worse . On top of that I am having major anxiety at night. The doctor did not want me to take Xanax as it is highly addictive. I will report after my next visit and let you guys know how it goes. Thanks again for responding to my post.

Keekee, thank you for the update.

I am glad you are getting help. It is going to take time, but it sounds like you are on your way to a better life. Does your husband notice a change?

Have you talked to your doctor about alternatives to Xanex which would help you rest if not sleep? Diet, exercise, and things like meditation can help your mind and body without interfering with your medication. Though, you might want to consult with your doctor and pharmacist about any foods or drinks that might reduce the effectiveness of your medicine.

Good luck and best wishes.

Hi,I was not aware of this thread until this AM,so I would like to add to what CAT1846 has offered, what a gal that CAT!

The Depakote will need to be monitored for the blood levels,as your GP probably noted, therapeutic levels are different for every person(meaning for a person like me,I need to take 500 mg 2 times daily to be at the lower limit of therapeutic. While others have been on much higher levels of it,say 500 mg 4 times a day.. it depends on the bodies abilities to absorb the medication.

The anger and moodiness can be regulated by therapy, to an extent.Learning the correct coping skills in cognitive therapy takes time,but it can work, if you want it to work.

If things are still too much,let the professionals make the decision for additional medications.

I am on up to 5 other medications for my bipolar disorder.

I have been on more than (guess) 30 over the last @15 years or so.

Sometimes changes have to happen,sometimes additional medications need to be introduced to combat symptoms which become more obvious as one symptom is stabilized, Unfortunately,psychiatry isn't totally a cut and dry science, trial and error are common.Our ability to adapt,accept the changes/roll with the punches,etc.. that's what makes recovery possible.

Don't loose hope if you happen to loose it someday, we didn't get to the point of ASKING for help overnight, we aren't going to be cured overnight either.. :)

I hope your days are going easier and your night get filled with pleasant dreams..

KBC