Hi,

I am sitting close to someone who chews their food/chewing gum so loudly that I can hear it all the time. It is extremely irritating and I want them to stop doing it but I don't know how to tell them in an way that will not offend them. Their loud chewing is certainly offending me, though! What do I do?

I think if you look someone right in the eye while they're doing it, and don't look away- almost like you're puzzled by the noise you're hearing, it gives them perspective that they're not alone in the room. Maybe it doesn't take words, but a glance that makes someone aware of their surroundings. If that doesn't work, I see nothing wrong with coming right out with it: "Do you hear yourself?"; "What are you a freakin' cow?"; "Are you seriously chewing like that right now?" ( Just a few ways you can sort of jokingly confront the situation.) Why should we tiptoe around inconsiderate people? Speak up!

Or just not sit close to this person.

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Originally Posted by FiliaF

Hi,

I am sitting close to someone who chews their food/chewing gum so loudly that I can hear it all the time. It is extremely irritating and I want them to stop doing it but I don't know how to tell them in an way that will not offend them. Their loud chewing is certainly offending me, though! What do I do?

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I have the same problem. I share a cubicle (it's like a 'double-wide') with this person who makes CONSTANT mouth noises. And she's such a sweet person that I can't imagine ever saying something mean. Plus, we share a freakin' cube - I'd rather not create an awkward situation. But then again, why should I be the only one to suffer. And I'm not the one with the annoying habit! Technically I'm not the only one because another co-worker joins me in misery - but he's 10 feet away, not 4!

Ice crunching. That's the culprit. It's not so much the crunching, but the sound of the ice sloshing in her large plastic cup as it falls into her mouth, where multiple cubes are consumed with a gasping, slurping noise, then the cup plops down loudly, and THEN the crunching, always with an open mouth for the last few crunches, followed by an icky sucking noise. This starts over again immediately after the last cube is swallowed. Why even put the cup down? We could reduce noise by 15%. AND IT'S A REALLY BIG CUP TOO... THAT GETS REFILLED AT LEAST 3X A DAY.

Seriously though, what are we supposed to do? Surely Miss Manners has a position on this.

What is wrong with being honest and tactful. In 1342333's case it may be easier as the person is a "sweet person."

Take the person aside so you can discuss the issue in private. Try saying something like, "Jane, I really like working with you, however, when you chew on ice, it affects me and my ability to concentrate on my work."

Make sure the emphasis is on the action, not the preson. Notice that the above statement doesn't accuse the person of being bad or having some sort of character fault. It's the ice chewing, not the person you don't like. Nor does it make an outright demand such as "stop chewing ice!" The person should be smart enough to figure out what to do.

Cut the person some slack. Most people aren't jerks and want to be liked by their co-workers. Most likely they don't know that they are doing something offensive. If they are mature people, they will appreaciate being told.

It's tough being on both sides of this conversation, but it is essentially saying, "I trust you enough to tell you this." If you finish with a "thank you" and a smile, then you've made the relationship stronger.

You may get an answer like, "Well, I don't like it when you yodel!" Your response to this should be an, "OK, I won't do that anymore."

And if the person chooses to take offense, you will have to live with the fact that if you were open and honest and respectful, then their offense is their problem.

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Originally Posted by FiliaF

Hi,

I am sitting close to someone who chews their food/chewing gum so loudly that I can hear it all the time. It is extremely irritating and I want them to stop doing it but I don't know how to tell them in an way that will not offend them. Their loud chewing is certainly offending me, though! What do I do?

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OH my I feel for you, I sit next to someone who gets angry every other phone call for some reason or another, and she either slams the keyboard, mouse or phone around! I wish the boss would say something to her, because that is company property she is banging around! But I'm there with ya, for the 'annoyed'...we are not alone!

Can you get an iPod? Listen to it. Problem solved. ;)

iPod shuffle is great, $79. I love mine

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Originally Posted by dflak

What is wrong with being honest and tactful. In 1342333's case it may be easier as the person is a "sweet person."

Take the person aside so you can discuss the issue in private. Try saying something like, "Jane, I really like working with you, however, when you chew on ice, it affects me and my ability to concentrate on my work."

Make sure the emphasis is on the action, not the preson. Notice that the above statement doesn't accuse the person of being bad or having some sort of character fault. It's the ice chewing, not the person you don't like. Nor does it make an outright demand such as "stop chewing ice!" The person should be smart enough to figure out what to do.

Cut the person some slack. Most people aren't jerks and want to be liked by their co-workers. Most likely they don't know that they are doing something offensive. If they are mature people, they will appreaciate being told.

It's tough being on both sides of this conversation, but it is essentially saying, "I trust you enough to tell you this." If you finish with a "thank you" and a smile, then you've made the relationship stronger.

You may get an answer like, "Well, I don't like it when you yodel!" Your response to this should be an, "OK, I won't do that anymore."

And if the person chooses to take offense, you will have to live with the fact that if you were open and honest and respectful, then their offense is their probelm.

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Hello,I thought it was just me and I've been beating myself up over feeling like this for years convinced it was my problem.I am very easy going but chewing loudly sends me loopy and although I hide it well I do feel very aggressive.I have worked with someone for 17 years yet feel unable to mention this for fear of upsetting him.Thanks for the posting,I'm glad its not just me,cheers dave.

Check your employee handbook of your company, in some companies, it is NOT ALLOWED to chew gums. If u find this line then give him/her a friendly advice, she/he might be appreicated you tell her/him.:)

Did you know that gum chewing causes an increase in the production of air biscuits.

Simply say it in a funny way like " i like the music you do while eating"... or try to change your place if not possible ask him /her politely to stop doing that as it irritates you...

Ms. Redrose

I had the same problem and it drove me crazy.

The way I got around it was to take a crowbar and wrap it around her face.

She stopped making noises not long after that.

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Originally Posted by l342333

Ice crunching. That's the culprit. It's not so much the crunching, but the sound of the ice sloshing in her large plastic cup as it falls into her mouth, where multiple cubes are consumed with a gasping, slurping noise, then the cup plops down loudly, and THEN the crunching, always with an open mouth for the last few crunches, followed by an icky sucking noise. This starts over again immediately after the last cube is swallowed. Why even put the cup down? We could reduce noise by 15%. AND IT'S A REALLY BIG CUP TOO...THAT GETS REFILLED AT LEAST 3X A DAY.

Seriously though, what are we supposed to do? Surely Miss Manners has a position on this.

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The post by 1342333 paints such a clear picture. Very funny...

My friend's mom likes very crunchy toast and scalding hot coffee. She toasts the bread and lets it sit to cool, then toasts it again. The crunching sounds like we're in an echoing cave.

Then she picks up her coffee cup and her top lip timidly quivers as it slowly lowers itself down into the cup to test the temperature (which is always scalding hot!! ) She makes three attempts, then goes for the kill. First there is the slow, cautious slurp followed by the longer more drawn out sucking, slurp. She waits, then gulps loudly. She bangs the cup on the saucer.

Now buttering this toast of hers is another story. She makes this irritating scraping... back and forth back and forth with crumbs flying everywhere. This goes on for a long time and we can't leave the table. If I had to work with someone like this, I'd go nuts too.

Secretly email her this vid YouTube - How Eating Loud Affects Your Co-Workers

Funny stuff... but this thread is 3 years old... heh.

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Originally Posted by JBeaucaire

Funny stuff...but this thread is 3 years old...heh.

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JBeau, it's a classic! :)

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Originally Posted by l342333

I have the same problem. I share a cubicle (it's like a 'double-wide') with this person who makes CONSTANT mouth noises. And she's such a sweet person that I can't imagine ever saying something mean. Plus, we share a freakin' cube - I'd rather not create an awkward situation. But then again, why should I be the only one to suffer. And I'm not the one with the annoying habit! Technically I'm not the only one because another co-worker joins me in misery - but he's 10 feet away, not 4!

Ice crunching. That's the culprit. It's not so much the crunching, but the sound of the ice sloshing in her large plastic cup as it falls into her mouth, where multiple cubes are consumed with a gasping, slurping noise, then the cup plops down loudly, and THEN the crunching, always with an open mouth for the last few crunches, followed by an icky sucking noise. This starts over again immediately after the last cube is swallowed. Why even put the cup down? We could reduce noise by 15%. AND IT'S A REALLY BIG CUP TOO...THAT GETS REFILLED AT LEAST 3X A DAY.

Seriously though, what are we supposed to do? Surely Miss Manners has a position on this.

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I laughed so hard when I read this mainly because I am experiencing the same thing in my office. It drives me crazy! When her ice crunching starts I get up from my desk and walk around the office, though it lasts so long that I can only be away for so long. Then I would put on my iPod headphones until she finishes.

How about just saying, "Would you please close your mouth when you chew?"

Oldie but goodie, but still closed