Ask Me Help Desk - I can't trust my girlfriend

Hey! I am new to this site, but it seems to have a lot of intelligent people when it comes to relationships, so I thought I would give this site a shot :)

I have been with my girlfriend for 5 months now, we are both 16 years of age. For the first few months our relationship was great, then we started having HEAPS of little arguments, which we still do now. These arguments usually start from her doing something that makes me feel uncomfortable, e.g, posting pictures of celebrity males on her "Tumblr" page, or Talking to her male friends instead of talking to me.
It even makes me uncomfortable when she goes on msn, because for some reason I feel like she is doing the wrong thing, I feel like she is talking to random guys on the internet behind my back.
When she goes out places with her guy friends it makes me feel like she is doing something bad or wrong, even though she has given me no real reason to feel that way.

I Know that this is a major trust issue, but she has said to me on several occasions "i'm sorry, i tend to do a lot of stuff without thinking about the consequence, i can't help it".
How am I supposed to trust her, if she even admits that sometimes she can't even trust herself to do the right thing?

I know that I'm a jealous person that can't trust anyone, I've come to this site hoping to find a solution,
I may only be 16, but I'm positive that I love this girl, I really don't want this relationship to end, I want to sort it all out, but I'm all out of ideas. :(

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Originally Posted by Blako2

I have been with my girlfriend for 5 months now, we are both 16 years of age.

Ah well then here is the thing, you're both 16. I hate to be the d!ckhead but I already know that this isn't going to last. Teen realtionships rarely do. The only reason it doesn't is because well simply because you're not don growing up just yet. What you want at 16 really does change at 25.

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For the first few months our relationship was great, then we started having HEAPS of little arguments, which we still do now.

First few months?? It is still the first few months!

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These arguments usually start from her doing something that makes me feel uncomfortable, e.g, posting pictures of celebrity males on her "Tumblr" page,

Key word celebrity. These are people she will never see or know or ever touch.

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or Talking to her male friends instead of talking to me.

Oh no she talking to other guys!?

Common' I bet you talk to other girls.

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It even makes me uncomfortable when she goes on msn, because for some reason I feel like she is doing the wrong thing, I feel like she is talking to random guys on the internet behind my back.

Ooh I bet she is... especially with a guy like you hovering over her. Let her be! She chose to be with you and your not exactly making her feel like she made the right decision if you're being a possesive boyfriend.

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When she goes out places with her guy friends it makes me feel like she is doing something bad or wrong, even though she has given me no real reason to feel that way.

You're the one making the problems, not her. She's allowed to hang out with her friends, and so are you. Stop creating problems.

You really need to get over this because it will develop into your adult years and then your just going to yet another one of those guys that women stay away from.

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I Know that this is a major trust issue, but she has said to me on several occasions "i'm sorry, i tend to do a lot of stuff without thinking about the consequence, i can't help it".
How am I supposed to trust her, if she even admits that sometimes she can't even trust herself to do the right thing?

No she doubts herself because she has an idiot boyfriend questioning her every move.

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I know that I'm a jealous person that can't trust anyone, I've come to this site hoping to find a solution,
I may only be 16, but I'm positive that I love this girl, I really don't want this relationship to end, I want to sort it all out, but I'm all out of ideas. :(

You don't love her. When you love someone you don't make them feel the way you do. Get over your worries, shut your mouth. She's 16 and so are you--- you both still have a lot of growing up to do. I thought I was very smart at 16 and now I realize how stupid I actually was.

In conclusion what I'm saying is if you still want a girlfriend quit riding her a*s about every little thing.

If I were her I would've dumped you already.

I appreciate your reply, having a go at me and calling me a ty boyfriend didn't really help at all, but thank you anyway.

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Originally Posted by Blako2

I appreciate your reply, having a go at me and calling me a ty boyfriend didn't really help at all, but thank you anyways.

Well what is it that you want to hear?

That you're doing the right thing and you're not pushing her away?

I want to know how I can stop being so stupid and jealous, I hate it but I can't seem to control it.

There will be many girls in your lifetime. At sixteen you're too young to be in a serious relationship. Without trust... dead end.

Hi OP if you have trust and jealousy issues then you do need to do something about them if you don't then they'll cause problems for you in any relationship you have now or in the future.

You need to look back on your life and see if you can find any occasions where you were perhaps abandoned, or rejected.

Did your parents divorce when you were younger, do you have siblings younger than you, these could be possible reasons for you having jealousy issues.

It would appear you have low self esteem, so try to figure out what's behind it, and you can then set about rectifying it.

You can also try telling yourself that how you respond to your g/f is because of your own self esteem, she's not your property she's also entitled to have a life on her own without you, you're not joined at the hip, you're in a relationship, not an ownership, you can't expect your g/f to live her life according to your wishes, why should she you're b/f and g/f.

No more no less, stop trying to control her, lighten up, or she will be gone before you know it. When you get jealous tell yourself she's not at fault you are.

You don't own this girl so please stop acting as if you do, you're not at liberty to be that way, If you don't stop these things then its your fault if she leaves.

Sorry but that's about the strength of it.

When you next get feelings of jealousy count to ten and tell yourself, its all in your mind, she's not doing anything wrong. Keep doing this, in time you'll over come the jealousy.

Still look for a reason for you being this way...