Hello,

I am 23 and my husband is 33. We recently got married in may. I cheated on him 1 year ago and did not let him know in the fear that he was going to leave me. I slipped up and told his friend when I was drunk which in turn told him of course. He is very upset because he gave me the chance to come clean about everything before we got married and I still remained to keep it a secret. Should he leave me? Or if he stays how can he get over what I have done? By the way I cheated on him with the same guy 3 different times.

Cheating obviously was a problem but the real problem was lying when you had the chance to clear the table.

My question is how upset and hurt is he now that he knows what you did? Is this a deal breaker to him?

Stringer

If you are cheating with the same guy, why did you get married?
I'm thinking if he finds this out, and since it was with the same guy, he may not ever trust you ever again.

How did you "slip up" with the friend? Were you trying to have an affair with him? Is alcohol a problem with you?

Your husband has every right to be upset. Your marriage is based on lies. What would YOU do?

I see no remorse in your post. How can he be so sure that it won't happen again? And again?

Cheating, drinking, cheating, drinking... Spells disaster.

When you add lying to this, it's irreparable. I have no sympathy for a spouse who cheats.

She wasn't a spouse when she cheated.

How long had you been dating when this cheating took place?
You didn't tell him when you had the chance and then you got drunk and told his friend. IMO his friend had no right to tell but he did and now you need to just face the consequences of what you did.

Don't have children. You cheated on your bf/husband and didn't tell him even when he ask?

As I said before drinking and cheating do not make for a very good marriage. Boyfriend, husband, whatever he was at the time, you were supposed to be true to him.

Lying to him, well I don't think there's any trust left on his part. To tell his friend added fuel to the fire.

I've always thought that even though cheating is wrong, a one time slip up is somewhat forgivable. Two... three... isn't a slip up.

I guess you will have to wait, and see what he thinks about this revelation, and what he wants to do about it. Its entirely up to him.

Hello,

I have to admit, I almost gave you the benefit of the doubt, that is until I read your last sentence about how you cheated on him three times.

I want to believe that you have some feelings of guilt now, or else you wouldn't be seeking help. However, you did cheat three times, which on the other hand leads me to believe that you are selfish.

Let me throw this back at you, how would YOU feel and what would YOU do if the tables were turned? Would you stay with him?

I mean come on, let's be realistic about this, why would this man who has most likely been faithful to you want to hang on to you?

Can you answer that to me?

You can't hide your lying eyes. Should have told him. He'll never trust you fully again and really ; who could blame him?