Well I guess like most folks I am on here for someone to help me when I know that I need to help myself:<(
Rreally I just can't hang on anymore to be honest... Let me start over!
I am 21 married no hsd no ged living with my in laws can't have children and can't commit to god NOTHIING!!
I have tried so many different things and only one have shown me anything and that's god but whenever something bad happens I start drinking again. I find myself unhappy with life itself and just ready to end it all. Now I know that sucieded is a sin and will lead me to hell but if hell is on earth then how can I be afraid of hell??
I can't get my ged( I have tried and tried and tried) I can't have children(again I have tried and tried and tried) even my kid sister is having a baby and SHE IS 19... I can't really even be a good wife even though I feel that I am trying my hardest to!!
I want to do so much good in the world but when I put the money where the mouth is I fail... I can get a job but nothing that I can count on.
You want to count my luck, I was better at being a stripper then I am being me right now and it just drives me crazy!!
I use to try to look to my step baby but now even her mother is taking that piece of joy from me. I am under a rock and it is truly crushing me day by day,
I don't want know what to do and I feel myself slipping over... I have a husband but he really can't help me you know I just take my anger and lash it out at him.I been to a psych doctor(my inlaw is one) and all she did was give me some meds that made me feel numb!!
Please help I know this may sound stupid to someone but for me it really is life or death and I feel my heart is truly choosing death
