I hurt my boyfriend and I accused him of having sex with another woman and giving me a irritation and then I find out that I donot have any irritation,and now he say this it I must find another man and he have my house keys and my cell phone and I ask for my things back and he does not give them back and he have few of his clothes here at my house and I said to come and get your stuff but I live in a security place and he will have to let me know went he is coming for me to put is name at the gate in order for him to come in. We been together for years and I love him and miss him do he still have feelings for me it been 4 days our break up.

You did make a nasty accusation about him not only sleeping with someone else but of him possibly having given you something as well.

His feelings and his pride are hurt understandably.

I don't know how you'll get your keys back or your cell phone, you could tell security in your place that you would like the locks changed because you lost a set of keys, it might cost you to do this. However you also say he cannot just access your place if he wants to get his things you would need to give his name to the security. So perhaps that's not such a big issue.

As for him ending the relationship, all you can do is go along with what he says he wants, give him some time to think about it, don't worry about him collecting his stuff, if its ended for good he will get them in his own time, just don't use them as an excuse to get him round to your place.

You could write him a letter maybe and explain you know you were wrong to accuse him, however I would ask why did you think he had cheated? Im thinking he must have done something to cause you to think that he had.

Do you have trust and Jealousy issues with him normally,or was this a one off?

You say you've been with him a long time, can I ask how long Please?

Have you and he split up before?

All you can do is what's suggested here, don't go running after him, let him think this through without you pressuring him, that will just make him more determined to stay away from you.

Let him lick his wonds. Then if he wants you back he will let you know but if you don't give him anytime to process this then you will lose him for good...

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Originally Posted by positiveparent

You did make a nasty accusation about him not only sleeping with someone else but of him possibly having given you something as well.

His feelings and his pride are hurt understandably.

I dont know how youll get your keys back or your cell phone, you could tell security in your place that you would like the locks changed because you lost a set of keys, it might cost you to do this. However you also say he cannot just access your place if he wants to get his things you would need to give his name to the security. so perhaps thats not such a big issue.

As for him ending the relationship, all you can do is go along with what he says he wants, give him some time to think about it, dont worry about him collecting his stuff, if its ended for good he will get them in his own time, just dont use them as an excuse to get him round to your place.

You could write him a letter maybe and explain you know you were wrong to accuse him, however I would ask why did you think he had cheated? Im thinking he must have done something to cause you to think that he had.

Do you have trust and Jealousy issues with him normally,or was this a one off?

You say youve been with him a long time, can I ask how long Please?

Have you and he split up before?

All you can do is whats suggested here, dont go running after him, let him think this through without you pressuring him, that will just make him more determined to stay away from you.

Let him lick his wonds. then if he wants you back he will let you know but if you dont give him anytime to process this then you will lose him for good...

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I do have a trust and jealousy and we been together for 7 years plus I was married at the time when were seeing each other and he knew I was married and two years ago my husband and separated and for the past 2 years we been together and we had up and downs break up for a week and go back but he said I disrepect him and he is finish I need to find a man to have sex with that is it.

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Originally Posted by Patricia37

I do have a trust and jealousy and we been together for 7 years plus I was married at the time when were seeing each other and he knew I was married and two years ago my husband and seperated and for the past 2 years we been together and we had up and downs break up for a week and go back but he said I disrepect him and he is finish I need to find a man to have sex with that is it.

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From what's written above, it appears that you cheated on your husband, with the latest b/f, then you accused the b/f of cheating on you and he's ended the relationship with you.
Now you say you need to find a man to have sex with..

So both yourself and your b/f have cheated in the past, knowingly.

So you don't really want the b/f back because you want him, you do though want a Man to have sex with.

Im not sure what advice I can give you, you can get a man for sex anywhere, just go up to one in the street, I think most will oblige, however I am thinking wheres yourself respect? Also are you practicing safe sex, especially as you've had more than one man at same time in the past if not now.

I admit sex is great but its not the bee all and end off everything, and it takes more than just sex to have a fulfilling relationship.

I do not wish to judge you but cheating on your Husband was wrong..

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Originally Posted by positiveparent

From whats written above, it appears that you cheated on your husband, with the latest b/f, then you accused the b/f of cheating on you and hes ended the relationship with you.
Now you say you need to find a man to have sex with..

So both yourself and your b/f have cheated in the past, knowingly.

So you dont really want the b/f back because you want him, you do though want a Man to have sex with.

Im not sure what advice I can give you, you can get a man for sex anywhere, just go up to one in the street, I think most will oblige, however I am thinking wheres your self respect? Also are you practicing safe sex, especially as youve had more than one man at same time in the past if not now.

I admit sex is great but its not the bee all and end off of everything, and it takes more than just sex to have a fulfilling relationship.

I do not wish to judge you but cheating on your Husband was wrong..

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I do love him my xboyfriend and in the beginning It was a sex thing and I always love my husband that was where my heart was at the time still my marriage end. The past two years that is when I fall in love with my X is was not about the sex but every time my husband call or come to see my daughter my X always think something is going on between us and was tired explaining it was nothing there any more my husband move on and one of the reason that I was cheating on my husband because he was cheating on me with his old long time girlfriend for years that who he live with and my X no that. Sex is not an issues at all I choose to be in a relationship with someone and my daughter is so use to having him around . I just want him back how can he just up and throw a way a relationship I just want him back and I was faithful to him.

Are you still married to your husband? I try to live by the theory that what goes round comes round.

I am still married and my X new that and he was still with daughter mother at the time when my husband and I BROKE up MY X had broke with his because she was cheating on him the hold time plus pregnant for someone else .So I do not see what is the issues I just want him back we had so many plan of getting marry and having a life together our both family new about us being together and his mother always say to him that I am his wife and his mother new that I am married and understand that I will be getting a divorce soon.

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Originally Posted by Patricia37

I am still married and my X new that and he was still with daughter mother at the time when my husband and I BROKE up MY X had broke with his because she was cheating on him the hold time plus pregnant for someone else .So I do not see what is the issues I just want him back we had so many plan of getting marry and having a life together our both family new about us being together and his mother always say to him that I am his wife and his mother new that I am married and understand that I will be getting a divorce soon.

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This sounds like a bad soap opera. Why don't you and the hubby try to set a better example for your children? There's more to life than sleeping around and fullfilling your own desires. God help your kids.

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

This sounds like a bad soap opera. Why don't you and the hubby try to set a better example for your children? There's more to life than sleeping around and fullfilling your own desires. God help your kids.

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My daughter is fine she understand this something my husband did years before I started I could not deal with my husband cheating went his girlfriend will keep calling my cell every day even if I change the number she will get it over and over still I could not take it any more still throw him out. I just want to make this right with my X I did not cheat on my at all I was faithful.

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Originally Posted by Patricia37

My daughter is fine she understand this something my husband did years before I started I could not deal with my husband cheating went his girlfriend will keep calling my cell every day even if I change the number she will get it over and over still I could not take it any more still throw him out. I just want to make this right with my X I did not cheat on my at all I was faithful.

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She is a child and you and your husband and your boyfriend are adults.
Stop with the moving from one guy to the next and concentrate on your daughter.

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

She is a child and you and your husband and your boyfriend are adults.
Stop with the moving from one guy to the next and concentrate on your daughter.

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Thank you and I am not moving from guy to guy my husband been over for 2 years straight and my X been there up still 5 days ago when 2days ago he said those things and I do take care of my child and my focus is always on my child first .

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Originally Posted by Patricia37

Thank you and I am not moving from guy to guy my husband been over for 2 years straight and my X been there up still 5 days ago when 2days ago he said those things and I do take care of my child and my focus is always on my child first .

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Leave the ex alone he does not want you anymore. Move on with your life and try to find happiness within yourself before you get into another relationship. Good Luck

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

Leave the ex alone he does not want you anymore. Move on with your life and try to find happiness within yourself before you get into another relationship. Good Luck

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How do you no that he does not want me any more well u say that I will just throw is clothes in the garbage them and call it a day

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Originally Posted by Patricia37

How do you no that he does not want me any more well u say that I will just throw is clothes in the garbage them and call it a day

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Do what you have too. Don't throw his clothes away. Let him come and get them.

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

Do what you have too. Don't throw his clothes away. Let him come and get them.

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I been telling him that if it is over come and get your and let me get mine that was on Sunday and Wednesday this week I am giving to next wed that is it and they go in the garbage along with him.

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Originally Posted by Patricia37

I been tellin him that if it is over come and get your and let me get mine that was on sunday and wednesday this week I am giving to next wed that is it and they go in the garbage along with him.

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Good. Then move on with your life.