My X has accused me of all sorts of crimes over the past 3 yrs. He has stalked me, etc. threatened to and has show caused me for false things, threatened to report my 12 yrs. Dog to Animal Control because he didn't believe she was taken care of and had her rabies shot; accused me of stealing my children's toys; accusing my Mother of being an alcoholic; reported me to police for stealing from him; and before I HAD to leave, he closed out our joint accts. And over the years spent our money and I get no support and I have the children 24/7. He has caused and continues to attempt to have go to therapy to cause me to incur costs and fees I can't afford; but this is about the continued threats to report me to police for stealing and his continuing to contact the GAL telling him that I should be in therapy. He accused me of alienating our children, which I have not done and caused lots of court ordered therapy for all of us, and he won't stop harassing me in e-mails with false accusations and threats about going back to court, etc. The divorce is final and I got none of the items of our life together and none of our joint money, etc. I am having a very difficult time continuing to "let it go". I've been in therapy and in hypnosis to try to help me, and it has, but his harassing e-mails must stop. I'm trying to put into practice all the things I have learned from therapy, but there has to be some way to stop the continued highly emotionally accusations from this X. I don't want to take him to court, I've spent money I don't have and so much time getting through this process (no lawyer half of the time). I don't have time, money or energy as I am a single parent of our two teens and the sole supporter and provider for them and I an unemployable, so I make work for myself. I can't continue to take this kind of time and I have absolutely no money to pursue this. How can I stop him?

Unless you get the Court system involved - take the evidence to the Police and get him arrested, get a restraining order - you can't. This is nothing you can do on your own.

I don't understand why you got "nothing" in your divorce settlement - what is that about?

You CAN block his calls and e-mails, refuse to respond to him. Once he sees he can't get to you he may very well wander off and find another victim. His threats are evidently empty and meaningless. Anyone can threaten and he knows it upsets you.

But the legal answer is that you need to get the Police/Courts involved in this.

There is mental illness involved, but he has the money and the high powered lawyer. I did not suspect that he would be so mean and absolutely lie to everybody before I even knew we were getting a divorce. It is a classic case of "legal domestic abuse". The "gas lighting", projecting, and all, back up by a highly respected $300 per hr. lawyer, who represented her client well with little or no regard to the well- being to the children. He sort of created this "wave" of anti-wife and it all sounded so plausible, it worked. Sad really. Money goes a long way here. It's been really hard on the rest of the family. When I had to leave him, it was on the advice of a 6yr. Family therapist's advice. At that time, the laws protected my X and his records. I wasn't able to afford to take the therapist to court, in fact he has a judgement against for the last $1,000 I owe him from me and the kids trying to work things with my X. Too much. I just want to stop the harassing e-mails and accusations and subsequent stress this creates. Can I sue him for intentional infliction of emotional distress? Is that called a "Complaint"?

Part of the reason it is almost impossible to "block" him is because we were in court ordered "co-parenting". I'm ordered to inform him of the children's doc appts and school meetings. He knows where I am, very often. It's all wrong, I have my personal safety to consider, but I can't influence the kid's thinking other than their father is a man that cares for them. One sees him when she wants to, he bought her a car, the other does not want to see him at all, for his own reasons. That is beginning to work out for my son. This as been really difficult. I have two Police reports in on the X now. It's hard to get into court again, without the kids being involved and I hate to do that even though they are teens. It's too hard.

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Originally Posted by dianeclement

I hate to do that even though they are teens. it's too hard.

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Hello diane:

Ok, so don't.

By the way, what is your question in CRIMINAL LAW. I don't know you from Adam.

excon

Quote:

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Originally Posted by dianeclement

There is mental illness involved, but he has the money and the high powered lawyer. I did not suspect that he would be so mean and absolutely lie to everybody before I even knew we were getting a divorce. It is a classic case of "legal domestic abuse". The "gas lighting", projecting, and all, back up by a highly respected $300 per hr. lawyer, who represented her client well with little or no regard to the well- being to the children. He sort of created this "wave" of anti-wife and it all sounded so plausible, it worked. Sad really. Money goes a long way here. It's been really hard on the rest of the family. When I had to leave him, it was on the advice of a 6yr. family therapist's advice. At that time, the laws protected my X and his records. I wasn't able to afford to take the therapist to court, in fact he has a judgement against for the last $1,000 I owe him from me and the kids trying to work things with my X. Too much. I just want to stop the harrasing e-mails and accusations and subsequent stress this creates. Can I sue him for intentional infliction of emotional distress? Is that called a "Complaint"?

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I actually work in the legal system so I'm having trouble with all of this - yes, a good Attorney (and they aren't all high priced) can get better results than someone who is inexperienced or just plain not qualified. HOWEVER State Laws apply. For example, in NY one child gets 17% of gross income as child support. If the Attorney is free or $300 an hour the child gets... 17%. Marital assets, of course, are negotiable because NY is not an equitable distribution State. I don't know where you are.

I have no idea what Laws protect his financial (or other) records from being admitted in a Court proceeding. Could you explain that?

I also don't know why the well being of the children - physical and mental - was not taken into account. Wasn't there a legal guardian appointed for the children? Didn't the Court require that all parties see an independent therapist?

Sure, you can sue him for anything - intentional infliction of emotional stress is a hard one to prove but if you find an Attorney who will take the case and you can provide proof that your ex knows he can and is trigging anxiety or fear in you, sure, sue him.

I think the easier path is to get the Police involved. It's also a lot less expensive. In fact, there's no expense to you at all.

I still don't understand how you walked away with nothing OR what proof he had that caused you to walk away with nothing.

I'm not saying I haven't seen Judgments that absolutely fly in the face of the Law - because I have. I just don't understand the process as you went through it.

Please don't start new threads for the same question. OR related to that question.
I have merged them, which sometimes get them out of order slightly