Hi. My name is Ashley. I'm 19 years old and I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 1/2 years. I really do love him, more than anything. We've been through so much together and he's my best friend. But I think he may be 2 different people. He has these anger issues, and he takes his anger out on me ALL the time. I try to be patient because I know he hasn't exactly had it easy in life but I'm becoming concerned about my emotional state. He's never actually hit me or punched me but he does get physical. He pushes and shoves, once he dragged me out of bed and out of our bedroom by my foot and slammed the door and locked it, left me out there crying. I've slept in the backseat of my car a few times because I can't handle being around him. He says hurtful things and it kills me inside. He tells me he doesn't like me and calls me a , then half an hour later he's appologizing, and I put up with it. I've become so attached to him throughout these past couple of years, he's been with me through a lot and helped me through some very tough times. His dad died when he was 10 and I think that may be the reason he is the way that he is. He was so close to his dad and after he died his mom started drinking all the time (he's told me that when he was 11 he'd have to drive his mom home and he'd sleep in the car waiting for her to finish up and the bar.) I've told him that he's got a problem and it makes him mad and he says that I'm always putting him down and making him feel like , but he doesn't feel that I get the worse part of it. I've cried so much over this guy, and it IS worth it to a certain extent... I'm willing to be with him and help him through his anger issues and I don't know how to and sometimes I don't know if I can handle it anymore... I have a lump in my throat just thinking about it. I've heard him cry like I've never heard anyone cry before. Its hysterical... yet my tears mean nothing to him. God I just don't know what to do, I really don't want to leave him, I feel like I'd being losing so much more than just a boyfriend if I left him. I guess my question is... Am I being abused? And well How can I help him? Any advice would be wonderful! Thanks for reading, it truly means a lot.
-Ashley