It sound little gross but I don't mean to offend anyone. I am asking this question to matured adults who have risen kids and have experience in sex life. Because I feel I am being fooled by my loved one.
So, just to start with - I have married my loved one last year and we have great relation. Only my curiosity with her is - during our dating, she told me she has never given birth nor has any miscarriage. She was widow and I was widow too first and divorced with second marriage. We are both in the 40s and never had sex prior to the marriage. First of all, when we have sex and I am in her, she does not have any grip (vaginally) at all regardless of position. Secondly, when we are both done with the sex and trying to get out of intercourse position, we hear loud flapping sound from her vagina. I have this experience from my late wife that after the second natural birth, she had that sound. From my second wife, there was not any such sound as she was virgin too when I married her. So, my current wife is 3rd women I have intercourse with but what I face is not consistent with what she is telling me. Interestingly, she does not want to get up from the intercourse position until I am out of bed and go to bathroom. I made her to get up first to observe it; she is very careful and just slides like snake to avoid the flapping sounds. I have not dared to ask her and I don't think it is fair. But my question is - should I tolerate if she is lying me? With great respect, I want answer from experience adults. So far I have great relation with her and this truth will not impact on my relation with her unless she changes in the future.

Giving birth is not the only way the muscles lose conditioning. It sounds like she is naturally not tight and maybe very embarrassed about it. It could be that her late husband was extremely well endowed or that they experimented with different ways of having sex (being 'kinky' is term some would use.)

Have you talked to her about your concerns? Have you told her that you think she has lied to you? If so, that could make her even more self-conscious about not being as tight as you think she should be.

Can she be open about talking about sex and sexual acts with you? Does she think that you would be judgmental or have you agreed not to talk about the past?

Something that might help with vaginal tightness and is good exercise for both men and women are Kegel Exercises. They are for toning the pelvic floor muscles which help
Support the bowel and bladder as well as the vagina. This link will explain more:
Kegel exercises: A how-to guide for women - MayoClinic.com

I think YOU, sir, are the one with the problem.

There are soooo many reasons that a woman's vagina is different from another woman's vagina, it's not even funny.

Your comparison is the same as if she accused you of having sex with men because your farts smell a certain way.

Get over yourself.

Your question: Should I tolerate if she is lying to me?

You should not tolerate her lying to you. Trust is betrayed by lies.

A few comments on your post.

The woman's vagina is meant to pass a baby through it. It has amazing stretch and elasticity. All vaginas are different, some are, and I hate using the term, tighter than others. The tightness may change due to childbirth, but she might have been born that way.

If she has said that she's never given birth, trust her. If she has, than she probably has a good reason to keep that to herself. Everyone has secrets and even the closest couple will have things their partner doesn't know.

Queefs. Vagina gas. Sounds like a fart but comes from her vagina. That's normal. Your are pushing and pulling your penis in and out. It can cause air to become trapped in the vagina, and when you pull out the air will rush out. It is just how things work. There is nothing bad about it. It can be a little embarrassing for the woman. Don't make a big deal about it.

I personally giggle like a little school girl when my girlfriend queefs.

In the end, trust what she says. Point her to the website that Cat1864 has given you. Get her to do Kegel exercises. That should help.

Good Luck.

You sound paranoid and insecure. Now you're making her feel the same.

Unless you have any other good reasons to doubt her then it's time to start focusing on pleasing her not worrying about the tightness of her vagina.

Women often lose elasticity in their 40's.

I wonder if there is a chance that the OP is not as well endowed as he would like to believe.

Some men have large penises, others have small ones.

Some women have tight vaginas, others have not so tight vaginas.

It's how the human body is made.

J, I think the problem here is a cultural one along with limited experience.

Namdu, please don't place your marriage at risk by assuming your wife is lying to you. I believe she is telling you the truth. You have to ask yourself what would she have to gain by lying to you? It is very difficult for any woman to maintain a lie as big as the one you are suggesting.

As you can see by all the good information you are receiving here, there are so many reasons this problem is occurring. Frankly, I think it is the queefing situation Craven suggested. The reason she may slide out of bed and is so very careful is because she if afraid you will think she is passing gas and may think less of her because she cannot control it. She may be just as puzzled as you are and might be more embarrassed.

Please stop worrying about this. You will ruin your marriage if you insist on believing she is lying to you. Give her a hug and tell her you love her.

Thank you all for your nice comment and suggestion. I really appreciated. This is my first time on this blog and I feel this is where I turn to for any question in my personal life.

Oddboots and Synnen: you are free to opine the way you feel. I have to say to you both that your answer did not help me at all. It rather puts me more doubt. As Just_another_Lemming suggested, it could be due to my limited exposure with women and I believe most of us in this blog are same as far as having relation with woman if not all nor I know anything about you two! I also don't believe to have relation with as many as women you feel like just for the sake of sex. My divorce with 2nd wife was very painful. Thank you though for giving me opportunity to write this.

Again, thank you all for your nice comments.

Namdu1,

Before I ever had a baby, queefs happened. Certain positions seem to make them "worse." I used to try to hide it, it was very embarrassing. I used to especially feel ashamed with my first husband who would always look at me like I'd done something incredibly disgusting, as if I'd done it on purpose.

With my second husband, we both laugh when it happens. Sometimes we even try to make it happen, so we can laugh.

When a woman becomes aroused, the vagina gets larger towards the top. It opens up and can hold more air. Queefing, can be, like wetness, a sign of arousal. So, without being her, or you, I'll assume that her body is simply saying she wants you and enjoys sex.

You said you have a good relationship. Be thankful of that.

From what you say about your reasons for doubt I feel that you are going way out on a limb.
Your reasons for doubt are well refuted in the above posts and I suggest you let it drop and be happy you have a good relationship.