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-   -   Only 17, Pregnancy and Babies (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=487325)

  • Jul 11, 2010, 12:35 PM
    lucozade123
    Only 17, Pregnancy and Babies
    I am nearly 18, I have been with my boyfriend for around a year however we have been friends longs before. I have never been happier. He has just landed a very good job which will be able to support a family. I have just finsihed college and now have an interview for a good job next week. We are looking for a house together and are both driving with cars. We want to have a baby and I just want everyone's opinion on whether you think we sound ready. I do feel ready for the responsibility, I don't drink and I don't smoke so there will be no big losses for me. Thanks everyone x
  • Jul 11, 2010, 12:48 PM
    redhed35

    Your just starting on a 'new life', now is the time to enjoy the benefits of working and the freedom that comes with being an adult.

    In two or three years your life will be totally different.

    I had my first child when I was 19 and my second just before my 21 first birthday,I had been with their father for 8 years,and even though neither were planned the relationship fall apart under the strain,we were just too young.

    I'm not sayng that will happen to you,but I would urge you to consider waiting another year or two.

    I never got to go on a sun holiday,I never had nice things,and I never had the time or freedom to really enjoy my twentys,I took the responsibility of my children seriously and that's what I did.

    Now at the grand age of 38,looking back,I missed out on a lot,its only in the last few years I can afford the things I want,and have the time to do the things I always wanted to do.

    There is a lot of rearing in children,and babies put a lot of pressure on even the most stable relationships.

    My advice,enjoy your time now,there's plenty of time for babies.
  • Jul 11, 2010, 12:48 PM
    Wondergirl

    Why not work at that good job for a few years, get a little bit of life lived and have some fun (maybe get married?), and wait with the babies. It is so true that your life changes drastically once there's a baby in the picture. I didn't believe it when people told me that, and I'm sure you won't believe it either. After all, babies are sooooooo cute!!

    I loved raising my kids and being a mom, but it is so nice to have adult children now and be able to sleep past 6 a.m. I also have time to read entire books, fiddle around with cooking and baking, have no baggies of Cheerios and raisins in my purse (no Hot Wheels either!), don't have to wash several loads of laundry every day, can be outdoors whenever I want to be, can grocery shop alone, and the lists goes on.

    I was 25 when I had my first baby. Had I been smarter, I would have waited.

    ***ADDED*** One of my kids is autistic, so that made for problems from age 4 on. He's 39 now and has a good job, is doing well. I'm glad I was as mature as I was so I could juggle his problems with the rest of our family life. And, by the way, we didn't figure out he is autistic until he was out of high school. Autism was thought to be rare back then, and it wasn't talked about at all. Not that you will have a child with problems, but then, I never thought I would either.
  • Jul 11, 2010, 03:18 PM
    lucozade123
    Comment on Wondergirl's post
    Thanks for your advice it has really helped. I forgot to mention that my boyfriend is already 23 and has a baby son of two who I adore. He is a handful as he is. Maybe I will consider waiting till I am a couple of years older after all I want to be a
  • Jul 11, 2010, 06:49 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Take time to be a couple and build that relationship

    But 17 and just finished college?
  • Jul 12, 2010, 04:26 AM
    lucozade123
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Yeah I turn 18 in 6 months and I have just finished my A levels

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