My girlfriend hits herself when we argue, what does this mean?

Could you give a little more information please?

How does she hurt herself,hitting her head on the wall,thumping herself?

I'm trying to figure out the problem,if you could give a little more information,that would be good,also her age.

It means she is angry and refuses to hit you and has trouble processing anger and need to go to assertiveness workshops and anger management workshops - which you may need to too. Just about all of us can get something out of it. If she is really hurting herself though she needs help. Ask her if she is wanting to kill herself? How? When? If yes and it sounds legit/serious you need to call the adult protective services and they will help her - you can not solve that problem. If it is not that serious - then see how it works to give her a phone book to tear up. Ask her when she is calm... tell her you would like her to go to the above work shops with you.

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Originally Posted by tom81

my girlfriend hits herself when we argue, what does this mean?

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It means she has a problem she may need the right help from, to overcome. And don't take it personally that you may NOT be that right help.

This link may help with Anger Management until you can get signed up for something more professional.

Anger-Management

Hi Redhed35,

She hits herself in the face and chest scratches herself,punches walls I have to physically stop her, We are no longer together because of this.

tom81,if you keep your questions concerning your ex on the boards you will get more varied answers and it will open your question up to more posters who will have some insights.

Its would sound to me that maybe your ex has a chemical imbalance or it's a learned behaviour,maybe as a child she found hitting herself helped release the anger and frustration if she was being told off by her parents,and this was /is her way of coping with anger and frustration.

She would need help to break the cycle and find other coping skills that are less harmful.

Anger management as another poster suggested or therapy is a starting point.

It won't just go away on its own as it's a repetitive behaviour and the only way she knows how to find a release.

For you,know that it was not your fault,it was nothing to do with you,you did not make her do it,this was something she learned to do a long time ago.

I have hit myself. In my case it is due to feelings of extreme Disrespect from my boyfriend. He has a way of turning situations around on me. I hit myself telling myself how stupid I am for being so giving or trusting and being met with disrespect.