Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Teens (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=327)
-   -   Do I really love my best guy friend without knowing it? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=485463)

  • Jul 5, 2010, 03:09 AM
    FustyBee
    Do I really love my best guy friend without knowing it?
    I've been friends with this guy (let's call him Frank) for 2 years now, but this year we've become even closer, and we are practically inseparable, always hanging out. Just for the record, we are both 16. A lot of people think that we go out, and when we say no they say that we should. We are used to this now and most of the time just shrug it off.
    However, recently I've been mulling over this a lot. I think about Frank a lot of the time, and he is often the last thing I think about before going to sleep at night. When I don't see him at school, my day is less fun and I miss hanging out with him.
    A scary thing is that I can also see myself going out with him, like it was meant to be. When he hugs me, I don't want to let go. I can talk to him about anything, he always knows how to cheer me up, and we laugh together all the time.

    So, what do the rest of you Help Desk answerers think? Underneath it all, do I actually love Frank?
  • Jul 5, 2010, 04:30 AM
    fiona585
    I've been in this situation before, and it ended up telling him was the best thing I did. It was a little different seens as my best guy friend is 23 and I am 16 however, I told him I thought about him all the time and that he was the best thing that had happened to me so far. It ended up that he felt the same. We both now know that we like each other and we are not together in a relationship as we have decided not to label what we have as we do not want to ruin the friendship we have. So I think the best thing you can do is talk to him about it, but before you do just say "promise me one thing, this wont change anything"... then you know that whatever he feels things won't change and if they do change they can only change for the better.
  • Jul 5, 2010, 04:34 AM
    redhed35

    If you have to ask if you love him,then you don't,when your in love you know it,there's no middle ground,either you are or your not.

    If you can talk to him about anything,approach the subject and see what he thinks.

    But take care,is a romantic relationship gone wrong worth losing the friendship.
  • Jul 5, 2010, 04:39 AM
    Aurora_Bell

    No one can tell you if you love Frank or not. That is something only your heart can tell you.

    At 16 your hormones are running kind of whack, and a good friendship with the opposite sex, can at the best of times be confusing and exasperating. If you think you can stand dating him and than on the off chance losing him both as a boyfriend and as a best friend, than why don't you talk to him and see how he feels about the situation?
    Sex, dating and relationships can complicate a good thing. (Not that I think you should be having sex at 16, but I know it happens). Just remember most times, when you take that leap, there is no turning back. And for things to go back to the way they were is almost near impossible.
  • Jul 5, 2010, 05:23 AM
    cdad

    Love is not a feeling nor a decision. Its an experience for your mind and body. That's why you hear things like having shivers when near a loved one. One great thing you have now is information on the other side. You have someone you can trust. If you cross the line you may find out that yes your in love but its more like that of a brother and not a boyfriend. So once you cross that line it can get uncomfortable really quick. From there you both will have that in the back of your minds and the relationship will fade. Do you really want that? It's a weighty decision but sometimes its best to leave things alone. If he isn't sending signals your way that he wants to carry it further there is also another possibiity that you may not have considered. He might be gay. And then how would you feel for exposing him when he wouldn't be ready for it? Step lightly with this one.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:35 AM.