I was talking to my mom and she told me she doesn't like me having a boyfriend because at this age we are still trying to figure out who we are even though she really doesn't know anything about me and she all ways makes me feel self con chase because she tells me I'm fat and all ways makes fun of me even though I'm really thin and she says that guys are more interested in sex than who we really are which is true but some guys aren't like my current boyfriend which my mom has no idea about he just wants to take me to movies or hang out even though he is 2 years older than me someone please help me

I'll ask since Everyone else is going to.

How old are you? And how old is the boy you are considering dating?

She's 14. Also to the OP, please use punctuation, it makes it much easier to read.

Sorry, and yes I'm 14 and my boyfriend is 16, and I know my mom won't approve and I said sorry because I don't like to use puncuation.

You may not like to use punctuation, but it makes it easier for us to read. Soooo, if you want answers you will use punctuation. Right?

Yes I will try my best.

Mom's these days are even more worried about their daughters dating than ever. Let's be honest. Most 14 year olds that date (statistically speaking) are sexually active.

She probably is worried about you, getting pregnant, getting diseases etc...

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Originally Posted by jpbuzzworthy

Mom's these days are even more worried about their daughters dating than ever. Let's be honest. Most 14 year olds that date (statistically speaking) are sexually active.

She probably is worried about you, getting pregnant, getting diseases etc....

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That's quite an interesting statement,can you provide the statistics?

The op has given no reason to believe she is sexually active.

However I do agree with you that the op's mother is most likely worried about pregnancy and std's.

When you become a mom and your 14 year old daughter is dating, you might feel differently than you do now.

Remember, your mom was 14 once too. I bet she felt the same way when her mom didn't let her date at that age.

Why not have a heart to heart conversation with your mom? Maybe if you kept an open mind and heard her side of the story, you will understand her better.

Mom's only want what's best for their child. Though it might feel like she's being strict, she's only looking out for you. There's no reason to hold that against her.

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Originally Posted by jpbuzzworthy

Mom's these days are even more worried about their daughters dating than ever. Let's be honest. Most 14 year olds that date (statistically speaking) are sexually active.

She probably is worried about you, getting pregnant, getting diseases etc....

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I agree with Redhed. I can't find this statistic. Please provide the site. I'm not saying it's not true; I'm just saying I can't find that a majority of 14 year olds who date are sexually active.

I know you are concerned about "fitting in" - it would be helpful if you didn't make generalizations without facts to back them up. Just sayin'.

OK well 1.I am not sexually active nor will I be in till I'm an adult. 2. I know my mom wants better, and when she was a child of 14 nobody wanted to go out with her. Because she was fat and I know that's mean to say but she was and still is (but she working it off.) 3. its not me that she doesn't trust its him. Because 1 he's older than me 2 she doesn't trust any boys/guys around me 3 she doesn't like people who are not intelligent around me and he's not that smart. And every time I mention the word boyfriend she gives me that not no but h*** no look and then she says it. So what am I suppose to do??

also I don't need to fit in because with my friends we always act retarded. And we do things like runny around and then randomly dancing but I don't need to fit in I already have people that are in my/our little posse.

On behalf of everyone who has a mentally challenged friend or relative - I find your use of the word "retarded" to be offensive, crude and just plain ignorant. You are remarkably insensitive, even for someone who is 14.

I very much doubt that your mother (overweight or not) is jealous (if that is what you are trying to say) of your possible relationship and/or dating with this or any other boy.

I see your mother's point - you are far too young to date an 18 year old.

As a parent I would have problems with my 14 year old dating a 16 year old too.

Well I guess no body gets the point that he is very nice he some one I think any body would love but the only problem is that he is 16 and I'm 14. And I'm sorry that the word retarded bothers you but that's what me and my friends always say because that's how we are but I'm sorry to offend you I apoligize

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Originally Posted by gobrella

well i guess no body gets the point that he is very nice he some one i think any body would love but the only problem is that he is 16 and im 14. and im sorry that the word retarded bothers you but thats what me and my friends always say because thats how we are but im sorry to offend you i apoligize

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I have no idea what this means - you say the word "retarded" because that's how you are?

Why don't you explain to me - and everyone else who has a friend or relative with a disability - just what that means.

Yes, you're too young to date a 16 year old.

I too, find your use of the word retarded to be offensive, gobrella. There are, I'm sure many other people who do find it offensive also.

Rather than creating a problem, why not use words that won't be as likely to cause a problem, please?

Thanks!

I think your use of the word "retarded", is very, very rude and offensive. I hope you realize that word hurts parents with children who are handicapped or have mental or physical disability's.

I worked with kids who were crippled and who were emotionally and mentally challenged and never once did another child in school make fun of them by saying or doing anything to hurt them.

Parents of these children are so happy with each small accomplishment their child made, I've seen them cry.

One child who was in a wheel chair was sitting on the sidewalk in his wheelchair and watched as some of the other boys played football.He looked as if he would give anything to be out there with those others.

A few minutes later one of the older boys left the game, came over with the football and placed it in this boys small hands. He helped him until he was able to throw that ball to the kids who were playing.

Every child on the playground that day applauded and I was crying. I'll never forget that. The young man who helped this boy went on to graduate High School and College and he is still as kind as he was back then.

I know you apologized but think before you say or call someone that name again...

I would also encourage you to read the threads on this site from teens who think they might be pregnant. It's understandable that your mom would worry about you. You should be glad she does.

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Originally Posted by ZoeMarie

I would also encourage you to read the threads on this site from teens who think they might be pregnant. It's understandable that your mom would worry about you. You should be glad she does.

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Exactly... This child doesn't sound like she's ready for middle school... let alone dating. I'm with her mom on this.