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-   -   How to tell your girlfriend likes someone else (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=471548)

  • May 18, 2010, 09:13 AM
    dferguson
    How to tell your girlfriend likes someone else
    I've been going out with my girlfriend for six months now and since we first started going out I noticed that she smiles at her sister's boyfriend a lot when no one's looking. At first I thought that it was nothing because she smiles a lot. But the longer we've been together the more I realize things. Her sister and her boyfriend have been going out for five years now, so my girlfriend met him before me. I know that she loves me and that she would choose to spend time with me over him any day of the week, but lately I've noticed that she stares at him a lot when we eat out and she always tries to get his attention and stand out when he's with us. I know that this isn't normal for her, because she's never desperate for attention. There was a day when we went to the theatre and when my girlfriend and I bought our tickets and were looking for her sister and her boyfriend, we saw them kissing by the booth and my girlfriend just started walking faster looking down and was a little shooken up for a minute then gave me a forced smile when I looked at her. Because he is her sister's boyfriend of course she would not let herself fall in love with him and would try to get over him, but because she met him before me I feel like I'm her second choice, despite the fact that she loves me more than anything. I want to ask her but I'm not sure if she would be hurt and think that I don't trust her. Please give me some advice.
  • May 18, 2010, 03:41 PM
    talaniman

    Find something better to worry about. This does not rise to the level of concern you are taking it.

    Even if she has a crush on him so what? She is with you. Why even wonder, unless your just jealous, and that's your problem, certainly not hers.

    I wouldn't give this a thought at all. Just me!!
  • May 18, 2010, 06:19 PM
    rnjroofing

    Dude if she is kissing another guy, why are you still sticking around? Move on bud!
  • May 18, 2010, 06:23 PM
    talaniman
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by rnjroofing View Post
    dude if she is kissing another guy, why are you still sticking around? Move on bud!

    HER sister was kissing hr own b/f.

    Quote:

    were looking for her sister and her boyfriend, we saw them kissing by the booth
  • May 18, 2010, 06:26 PM
    BlackVY
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by rnjroofing View Post
    dude if she is kissing another guy, why are you still sticking around? move on bud!

    Sorry, I don't think you read the OP right.

    His girlfriend's sister was kissing HER own boyfriend, which is fine, and the OP feels like HIS girlfriend got a little shaken up seeing the sister and boyfriend kissing...


    OP:
    It might be that you girlfriend may have a little crush on her sister's boyfriend, but like Tal said, she is with you, so don't worry about it. Its just a crush. The sister's boyfriend is unattainable to your girlfriend even if she was single, and even if the boyfriend broke up with the sister, I really doubt your girlfriend and him would get together. I believe there is some rule between siblings too about this...

    Just relax and don't worry too much about it. Be happy that you have a girl who loves you as she does.
  • May 18, 2010, 08:53 PM
    Mommy102808

    I agree with the others this is just a crush. If not a crush maybe she is wanting with you what they have and your relationship to last five plus years. Unless something major happens which I truly doubt, just relax and enjoy life with her.
  • May 18, 2010, 09:20 PM
    Jake2008
    This is the way I read this.

    Your girlfriend flirts with her sister's boyfriend of five years.

    You and your girlfriends sister both saw your girlfriend, and her boyfriend kissing.

    It made both of you uncomfortable, and no wonder.

    Totally inappropriate!!

    I would have been gobsmacked, and while they were lip-locked, I'd likely dumped my pepsi on them to break them up.

    If you are wondering if there is something wrong with her behaviour- of course there is. If you doubt you have nothing to worry about and it is somehow petty, I believe you are wrong and need to take off the rose coloured glasses.

    If she loved you she would not be kissing another man, let alone her sister's boyfriend.

    Sheesh!
  • May 18, 2010, 09:21 PM
    BlackVY
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Jake2008 View Post
    This is the way I read this.

    Your girlfriend flirts with her sister's boyfriend of five years.

    You and your girlfriends sister both saw your girlfriend, and her boyfriend kissing.

    It made both of you uncomfortable, and no wonder.

    Totally inappropriate!!!!!!!

    I would have been gobsmacked, and while they were lip-locked, I'd likely dumped my pepsi on them to break them up.

    If you are wondering if there is something wrong with her behaviour- of course there is. If you doubt you have nothing to worry about and it is somehow petty, I believe you are wrong and need to take off the rose coloured glasses.

    If she loved you she would not be kissing another man, let alone her sister's boyfriend.

    Sheesh!

    Sorry Jake... but I think you got it wrong too...

    His girlfriend's sister was kissing HER own boyfriend, which is fine, and the OP feels like HIS girlfriend got a little shaken up seeing the sister and boyfriend kissing...
  • May 18, 2010, 09:34 PM
    Jake2008
    You're right! Thanks for that. I read it again, and now it makes sense.

    It was sort of like 'who's on first', a bit confusing.

    Couldn't greenie you, but thank you.
  • May 18, 2010, 09:35 PM
    BlackVY

    No worries Jake... it was a little hard to follow... :)
  • May 18, 2010, 09:53 PM
    Lucky098

    If it bothers you so much, talk to her. You'll never know what's going on without proper communication.

    If it makes you feel uncomfortable to be around your girlfriend while she's ogling her sisters boyfriend and probably future brother in law, say something. Don't allow yourself to get even more paranoid about something that might be completely innocent.

    I'm not saying to accuse her of anything either. You need to chose your words very carefully and at the right time. Causing her to have a crush on her sisters boyfriend of 5 years may end in you packing your bags too.

    But just talk to her. If you don't feel comfortable talking to her about what's bothering you, then come to terms with what's going on. She is YOUR girlfriend who is allowing YOU in her life. Maybe she's very happy that her sister found someone and things this guy is wonderful. Eternal happiness will cause you to smile too :)

    Relax.. Voice your thoughts, take a deep breath... and relax.

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