I love a guy named jude I don't know if he loved me but I cut my hand for him! I want t0 g0 and tell him but I don't have this courage can you tell me what t0 d0

Can you tell us how old you are first, please?

Ok, I see this is posted in "teens", so I assume you are a teenager.

I'll start by telling you that as a teenager, you are going to have boyfriends come and go. NONE of them are worth hurting yourself and causing a permanent scar. Boys who are boyfriends are temporary. Scars are permanent.

Cutting yourself for a boy you want to love you will likely cause the boy to want to avoid you, because, boys are not equipped to deal with the deep emotional problems that go along with having a girlfriend who practices self mutilation.

Furthermore, when you get older it won't be any fun explaining your scars to any/all who see them... that could be other friends, more serious older boyfriends, doctors who examine you, nurses, etc. employers... will they blow you off as a nut case? Possibly.

Lastly, there are other more healthy ways to deal with stress and anxiety and or depression than self mutilation. This cutting on yourself can grow into a pretty big problem. I hope you tell your mom so she can get you the help you need so that you can develop better coping skills. If you can't tell your mom, is there another adult in your life that you trust? A teacher, school counselor, a friend's mother? You need to tell someone who can actually help you get the help you need.

As you get older you will come to know that hurting yourself for a boy is a waist of time. You will meet better guys that feel the same about you as you feel about them. But there are ways that can help take your mind off him like shopping, yoga, drawing, etc. That will relieve stress and the thoughts you may have about him. You will see in the coming future.