I need advice. My husband's oldest wants to come live with us. We are from Ireland and moved to Australia 3 years ago, she lived with us before in Ireland and her mother had a fight with my husband and took her back. She has wanted to live with her dad and I since we got married (6yrs ago) and I know she wanted to live with her dad before that as well. Her mother promised her that once she has gotten her Jnr Cert in school, which she gets in about a month, she can move over to us in Australia. I love this girl to bits and would love her to come live with us but her mother hates me and won't even allow my name to be mentioned in her house. We are making plans for her to come live with us, looking at tickets prices and everything. What I would like advice on is how do we get her here without her mother saying we kidnapped her or something? What legal letter or document can we get her to fill out saying it's OK for the daughter to come live with her father and me in Australia? What else can we do to make sure that that once the daughter is here the mother cannot cause problems as far as saying we didn't have permission etc etc. Any advice would be great :)

That is a really good point.

To save trouble down the line, your husband should seek out legal counsel, and make sure that any permissions and modifications to child custody arrangements are in place, before she comes.

It would be terrible for this girl to arrive, and then have her mother change her mind and then charge the two of you with kidnapping!

You are smart to think of this ahead of time, and in enough time to get the legalities all sorted out.

You also sound like a very loving person to bring her into your home. She's a lucky girl to have you in her corner.

I agree with jake here, ( will be back to rep)

To the op, cross all the t's and dot the I's,legally protect yourselves before the girl comes over.

I don't know how this personally works but I am sure it can be a lengthy process to do custody agreements over seas. Just be patient. If the bio mom hates you so much, I wouldn't put it passed her to pull something horrible like that. Especially once she starts to miss her daughter.

The two countries are a long ways apart. It is going to be a huge adjustment for her and her bio mom. I would hate to have one of my children in a different country, let alone a different continent all together. Yikes.

But yes, be patient and make sure that EVERYTHING is perfectly squared away. You don't want the trouble doing this half way could bring.

If the question is purely legal this should be moved to a legal thread.

If it's personal advice that is being sought then it belongs here.

As always "Jake" is right on target with legal advice, as is Redhed. I have no idea where the other advice is coming from.

The process is no lengthier because of the distance between the Countries. There needs to be a custody change if this is the plan.

If the child is 18 y/o, he/she can travel without parents' consent, so just apply for a visa (if needed), buy a ticket and go...

If the child is under 18, he/she needs to obtain parent's consent, especially in case where the mother has sole custody. The sworn affidavit must be signed and acknowledged by concerned authority.

Since you are talking about relocation of this child, you need to contact Australian Immigration and find out what documents required, so you can get all done in one time better than going back to the nagging mother and get nothing done. We're talking about immigrant visa here. Good luck.

Thank you very much everyone for your advice. Jake - the main reason I am thinking about all this is because her mother has threaten to have my husband arrested every time he goes home to see his family, she has threaten me too many times to count and has even physically attacked me when I was taking Christmas presents to the kids granmother for them and when the daughter lived with us before the first fight the mother had with my husband she took the daughter out of school and we didn't see them for a few months, were not even allowed contact. So I know what she is like and want to make sure she cannot do anything. Larken - The daughter has wanted to live with us for so long now and we have warned her about the adjustment etc and she is ready for it. As much as I hate saying anything bad about another mother her mother would find it a huge adjustment and miss her but not in the way you and I would. The daughter is her baby sitter, she is always looking after her younger siblings (she is 15) and since she was about 9 she has even been making their lunches for school, getting them dressed and bathed and everything etc. So she would miss her because all of that will be gone. I have been told these things by the granmother, aunt and friends and have seen some of this myself as well. Once again thank you everyone for the advice, it helps a lot :)