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-   -   Working Mom vs. Deadbeat Dad (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=46824)

  • Dec 5, 2006, 01:22 PM
    jrsha
    Working Mom vs. Deadbeat Dad
    I am a working mom, attending school fulltime and custodial parent of 4 daughters. I receive less than half the state minimum child support from father whose income is solely what he makes selling fodder at local flea markets. We are currently scheduled to return to court to amend the settlement agreement to enforce his providing insurance benefits. His argument is that I, as a working parent should be liable for the insurance expenses since I make more than he does. He admitted to the attorney "remaining unemployed in order to avoid judgements and garnishments". Benefits are available through my employer, and I have paid for them without reimbursement from him for the last several months. This has left me forced to take a second job just to make ends meet. Is he correct in that I may have to share in the insurance costs or that I have no recourse in collecting any retro premium amounts? :confused:
  • Dec 5, 2006, 01:36 PM
    ScottGem
    If he has made himself judgement proof, then there is little you can do. He could be jailed for contempt of court if he doesn't pay, but then you get nothing.
  • Dec 5, 2006, 01:51 PM
    LUNAGODDESS
    I just do not get it, you had a lawyer that heard your husband say, he will work a low paying job to prevent from caring for his and your children... is this lawyer on your said or what? Fodder is that seed or fed? Get your lawyer to bring to the courts’ attention your entire situation. Judges hate it when they are played as fools! And as for paying half the insurance benefits well that is true... for you is the higher waged parent. Have the courts determine the amount, better yet, you make that decision on the amount of support you look forward to from the father of your children. Bring in your bills all of them including credit cards and highlight on the credit card bills expenses associated with the children, utilities, mortgage or rent or lease agreement, food, insurance health, dental, visual transportation cost etc... divided the bill by two and the amount is what you should look forward from your husband. As far as retro that decision is up to the judge. Revisit your situation legally...
  • Dec 5, 2006, 02:11 PM
    ScottGem
    I agree with Luna that courts and judges don't like being made fools of. But I disagree that much can be done in this situation.

    What Luna is missing is that the courts can't force the guy to work or earn an income. All they can do is punish the guy for not working and paying what he was ordered to. The form that the punishment takes is jail. In jail the guy is not going to have any income at all, so how is he going to pay anything?

    I'm not condoning what he's doing, I'm just trying to present the hard facts here. Your lawyer probably realizes this (if Luna doesn't). He probably told you what your ex said to show you the futility of trying to get him to pay more.

    The bottom line is; if he is willing to live on a minimal income to avoid paying you child support, then there is little you can do.
  • Dec 5, 2006, 02:28 PM
    LUNAGODDESS
    Of course, the courts cannot find work for someone or force someone to work but, it can order an amount to be paid and if not paid contempt charges will be filed and possible jail time... the father having this fact presented to him will have to make a decision Whether he is held in contempt and receive some possible jail time meaning no freedom. Or he needs to find work that can pay(s) for the support of the children... he (the father) is in check, so, the next move is his...
  • Dec 5, 2006, 02:53 PM
    BIM
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ScottGem
    What Luna is missing is that the courts can't force the guy to work or earn an income. All they can do is punish the guy for not working and paying what he was ordered to. The form that the punishment takes is jail. In jail the guy is not going to have any income at all, so how is he going to pay anything?

    Scott is correct here. The courts cannot make a guy work. My ex did the same thing. He quit a good paying job and got a 6.50 per hour job so his child support would be calculated lower. The courst also make me provide the health insurance, and he does not have to pay any of the premium.

    This boils down to your ex playing the system, just like mine, and there is nothing you can do about it. I know it really sucks.

    My ex lied that he ended up losing his job and was unemployed for 7 years and I could not find out where he was working. Just found out this spring that he bought a bar and has been running it for over a year.
  • Dec 5, 2006, 05:07 PM
    LUNAGODDESS
    Why are we victims here... my father played those games with my mother. He had people believing that he was paying the bills for the house. He was not. So, when my mother died, he still kept the her credit cards and used the ones in her name until he married some other woman then hide his assets from that woman by placing them in the names of his children.

    So, this is why I say what I say... if you found any signs of a dishonest practice then it is up to you to notify the courts and fight for the right for your children to live a life as comfortable as possible. Stop giving in to these jerks... one owes a business, bet he has it in the name of either one of his children or them all or some relative that is old in age... find out.. there are records on who owns what business... do not give up... again the courts cannot force him to work but, they can force him to pay what you request, if you are dogged about it... if all else fails get a billboard and say what a wonderful guy he is (sike)
  • Aug 2, 2007, 02:06 PM
    Momsside
    Ahhhh, the deadbeat game: "remaining unemployed in order to avoid judgements and garnishments".

    My ex husband is a pro at this game as well. He is court ordered to pay for health, life and dental on our two children and does none of it. He is currently in arrears to us for $30,000 paying $0 for the last 14 months. I pay over $200 per month for health insurance and that isn't covered when we speak of arrearages. That is a separate matter entirely. To sue him for this would cost way too much in lawyer fees, time, etc. Another thing I just have to "eat".

    At this point I do everything I can on my own and hope that he'll send anything. Isn't that ridiculous? I've adopted the attitude of "It'll just be icing" if he ever does pay but I've learned to never count on it. We struggle... really struggle... in fact, we just had to move in with my 72 year old mother to cut expenses. The ex is living in an inherited house that we have a lien on that nobody will enforce.

    This has turned me into a bitter, resentful woman. I am trying to change. I am trying to accept.

    I don't know if they'll make you cover insurance or not. My guess is that they will look at what is best for the child. Sorry to say, but like me, you may have to be the one to "do the right thing"; the sorry deadbeat will answer someday.

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