My boyfriend and I have 5 month old twins and he works nights. He had two older children and his x wife makes like a nightmare!

Everything is last minute, or changed at the last minute so it is convienent for her. I always compromise, and go with the flow. When the kids come, how long they stay is her terms. I told my boyfriend that I don't mind having the other two but four kids and one adult is not an easy task.

I asked her for some a bit of notice and arrangements be made and agreed upon at the time, she went off on me and told me I am being unreasonable.

It's her way or she pitches a fit, and my boyfriend defends her, and its pissing me off. I told him this and he says if he says anything he is scared she will hold the kids from seeing him.

If I tell her I have plans she gets all mad and I end up cancelling so his older kids can come over for a night or two, he's not even here, he works.

I don't know what her beef is with me, but I feel like I can never be the one to be "inconvienced"


Thanks

First of all you should try not to kick yourself and realize it is not your fault. That the x is just pushing the only string she has - the kids, and your husband just doesn't want to loose the ability to see them.
Try to plan ahead with your husband, and be patient. You have the upper hand. I think that if you don't loose your grip the x will find that she's not getting any attention and give up, then all will be better.