The father of my baby is a liar, how can I move on?
I have a baby that is 5 weeks old. I am living with the baby's father at the moment but the situation is shocking and not what I expected. We are both in our 30's. We admittedly didn't know each other long before I got pregnant, although it was no accident that I got pregnant. Before I got pregnant my BF told me that he had 1 son. But it later emerged that he also has twins that live in a different town that he has to pay CSA contributions towards but he isn't allowed to see them. He also didn't tell me that he had been married previously until I was 7 months pregnant.
I must have had the most stressful pregnancy you can imagine. I was made redundant, so had to start a new job for less pay. My BF has been unemployed and promising to start working self employed, but not doing what he says he will do. I was ill during my pregnancy and in hospital a lot. I also had to move house and redecorate my house and get tennents to rent it from me. While I was doing all this, my BF was drinking heavily with friends at the house. He promised that once our baby was born, he would stop his friends coming drinking...
All the stresses caused a lot of arguments and I resorted to staying with my Mum a few times. I was very highly strung as I was pregnant and anxious about money and BF was always taking money from me, but always found the money for beer. I will admit that the stress caused me to fly off the handle and stike him, because he would shout abuse at me and not listen to me. I felt and still feel so hostile towards him. I was pregnant with my 1st baby and he could have made life so much easier for me, but didn't.
I decided, against the advise of lots of friends and relatives to stay with him and let him attend the birth of our daughter and give him the opportunity to bond with her. But 5 weeks in, we are agrueing like cat and dog, he has his friends around. He is still drinking, still doesn't work.
I love him and feel so hurt that he doesn't put me and our baby first. I know some will say I should leave him, but I really want to try and make it work out. We have a daughter and I would love him to be a proper Daddy to her. Any advise?? Please help I'm going out of my mind...