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-   -   He needs help. His life is falling apart. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=466685)

  • Apr 24, 2010, 12:06 AM
    Kibako
    He needs help. His life is falling apart.
    I will post some quotes of his on here. Please help him.

    "I make mistake after mistake, and I'm slowly watching my life spiral in the wrong direction it seems. They're holding down careers, I don't have a job. They're buying their own houses, I live with my mom. They're getting married, I'm... yeah."


    I told him that I can help him and then he said:

    "Truth be told, I don't think anyone can? I mean, I put up such a front in real life, that if you saw all this, and then saw me, you' think it was two completely different people you know? But I really guess I should thank you? Idk. I'm just spending too much time drinking and thinking these days..."

    What should I do? I want to help him REALLY bad. Any advice to what I should say? This guy is in danger of committing suicide.
  • Apr 24, 2010, 12:13 AM
    Clough
    Hi, Kibako!

    Is this a person with whom you've been communicating in person, on the phone, using a chat room, or by texting, please?

    Thanks!
  • Apr 24, 2010, 12:38 AM
    Kibako

    Chat room.
  • Apr 24, 2010, 08:25 AM
    redhed35

    I would thread carefully here,you don't know this guy,he could be in trouble or he could be luring you into trouble.

    Don't give him any personnal information,suggest he seeks professional help,but don't put yourself in a position where you feel responsibility for a complete stranger,from god knows where and with god knows what motive.

    You may feel that he is genuine and you have a good radar for people,however,there have been many documented cases where people have found themselves in trouble or danger from interacting with strangers on social sites.
  • Apr 24, 2010, 08:50 AM
    DrBill100

    Continued non-critical communication. That means listening on your part while asking occasional questions that evoke a response from him while you show an interest in and understanding of what you're being told.
  • Apr 24, 2010, 09:08 AM
    redhed35
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by DrBill100 View Post
    Continued non-critical communication. That means listening on your part while asking occasional questions that evoke a response from him while you show an interest in and understanding of what you're being told.

    I agree with this statement,however,this is what a professional would say,someone who is trained specifically to evoke the responses.

    A professional could handle the responses that unfolded and would know which questions could best steer the ops 'friend' away from perhaps harming himself.

    The op does not give an age,only knows the person from a social site,and could unwittingly make the situation worse.
  • Apr 24, 2010, 09:33 AM
    Clough
    I have a couple of stories to share here...

    One, happened nearly twenty years ago, when people were first getting onto the Internet with chat and what-not.

    I had a male friend who had been chatting on-going with a female online. She led him to believe that she was terminally ill. It was later that he found out that it had all been a hoax. Boy, was he disappointed and sad and very disappointed that he'd been "taken" and fooled by the person who said that she was terminally ill.

    Another story...

    Another friend, with whom I happened to work. He was short, fat and bald. Not that those are bad things at all. But, he wasn't willing to accept that as being the way that he was.

    However, he told me that once he was online, he could be anything that he wanted to, like tall, dark and handsome.

    Best to be extremely careful when being online and chatting as well as revealing anything about yourself.

    What I'm getting at, is that the way that people portray themselves online could very well be the way that they are in actual life. People on this site who've been around awhile here, do tend to get to know each other. Some of us have called each other on the phone and even met each other in person.

    However, until someone has some justifiably verifiable information about someone they meet online, it's best to proceed with extreme caution.

    Thanks!

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