Ask Me Help Desk - 3 Y/O not sleeping in own bed

So I have a 3 year old girl, she just turned three a few months ago.

She has her own room with a toddler bed, however, she gets up in the middle of the night and goes to the couch and sleeps there [I don't hear her].

It's happened before, but it's been happeneing more recently lately.

Should I worry? Is this just another stage kids go through?

Also a week ago she went to go through some trash in the kitchen and ran out saying "ahhh scary monster". It was actually the vent behind the stove that allows fresh air to come in [it sometimes makes this noise when the wind is blowing]. I tried to explain that to her but still she's scared to go into the kitchen alone.

I don't know where she picked up this whole "scary monster" thing. She hardly watches t.v.

Could it be that she's scared of her room? She's been sleeping on her own for most of her life [she slept with me briefly when she was a newborn].

Well if you have and ideas or suggestions that would be great, thanks!

Do you speak to her about this? Have you told her that she must stay in her room/bed after bedtime?

I'd have suggested that you lock her into her room at night (please don't think me abusive about that) but what happens next should depend on what she has told you about these experiences of hers.

Can you tell us more about what she has said about it?

Yes, I know she's just 3, but I'm presuming that she can communicate at some reasonable level, with you, about it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by RickJ

Do you speak to her about this? Have you told her that she must stay in her room/bed after bedtime?

I've tried asking her. The conversation goes like this:
"Why are you on the couch? Why aren't you in your room?"
"Ummm..."
And that's about it. I don't really get a response.

Quote:

I'd have suggested that you lock her into her room at night (please don't think me abusive about that) but what happens next should depend on what she has told you about these experiences of hers.

You monster! Haha just kidding.

Locking in her room could work for time outs because she escapes her room when I give her time outs. But I don't think I'll lock her up for bedtime, I'd feel way too bad. Kind of like a wicked step mother.

It's not that I don't mind her sleeping on the couch, it's just that that's what beds are for. I'm also just wondering why she does it and if other kids do it too and how parents have "fixed" it.

Quote:

Can you tell us more about what she has said about it? Yes, I know she's just 3, but I'm presuming that she can communicate at some reasonable level, with you, about it.

She's never said scary monsters in her room. She's never indicated that she's scared of the room either.

I take sleeping pills at night to help me fall asleep, if I don't I'm up till 3, 4 or even 6AM--- so when I'm asleep I am gone gone gone.

Thanks for the response RickJ

Personally, I would not worry about it. I'm guessing it's just a phase. It's not hurting her or anyone else. I went through a phase when I was about 5 or 6 when I would get up and go sleep in my closet sometimes. I couldn't sleep and somehow felt I could sleep better in my closet. Who knows? But I stopped doing it. When my kids were little they occasionally slept in odd places--including the closet... They haven't done that in years.

Also, if you are having trouble sleeping maybe she is too? Do you both drink soft drinks with caffeine? Just a thought.

I would ask her more directly why she sleeps on the couch and if there is a problem with the bed or her bedroom. Or if there is something about the couch that attracts her. You may not get a satisfactory answer, but you can try a couple more times without beating it to death. :)

Finally, since you are so out of it, it seems at least possible that something happens in the night that drives her out of her bed, a garbage truck or some other disturbance? As before, just a though.

Caffine? Nope.
Sugar? Nope.

You know maybe she does feel more comfortable in the couch. It is cooler in the living room and there is a huge bay window that's by a birds nest and you can hear them all day and at dawn chirping away-- maybe she likes that? I know she loves birtds.

Ah well I'll try not to stress about it. And your right, it isn't hurting anyone.

Thanks!

Quote:

Originally Posted by mudweiser

I've tried asking her. The conversation goes like this:
"Why are you on the couch? Why aren't you in your room?"
"Ummm..."
and that's about it. I don't really get a response.

You monster! Haha just kidding.

Locking in her room could work for time outs because she escapes her room when I give her time outs. But I don't think I'll lock her up for bedtime, I'd feel way too bad. Kind of like a wicked step mother.

It's not that I don't mind her sleeping on the couch, it's just that that's what beds are for. I'm also just wondering why she does it and if other kids do it too and how parents have "fixed" it.

She's never said scary monsters in her room. She's never indicated that she's scared of the room either.

I take sleeping pills at night to help me fall asleep, if I don't I'm up till 3, 4 or even 6AM--- so when I'm asleep I am gone gone gone.

Thanks for the response RickJ

Been there and done that. Based on what you've said, I'd say that this is no big deal to pick as a battle. We have to pick our battles, I'd not call this one of them since she seems to agree that there's nothing in her room that she feels is scary.

I always used to move to a cooler spot.

Its only a suggestion muddy,but how about helping her to put up new pictures on the wall,get her involved in changing the room around,maybe new duvet covers?

Could she have a little friend sleepover? Kids are a lot braver in their own homes when there's another kid there too.
A shopping trip to buy 'magic glitter' to chase away any monsters,get dressed up and make a real show of it,spreading the glitter in the scary places and banish the monsters.