I broke up with my girlfriend a while back and it's come back to "haunt" my emotions
Well, a while back, I was dating this girl I knew for a few years. One day we finally came out and told each other how we felt about each other, but at that time I was going through some rough stuff in my life with school and my family so it was a pretty bad time for the relationship. Everyday I would be grumpy and depressed and she would always be happy and jumpy and I would take my mood out on her. I would usually block her out or get into an argument with her. I would always run away if I had a problem, she wanted to help me with my issues but I was always ran from my problems. Of course we made up. But one day, I found out my best friend had been in a car accident and died. She of course was in a happy mood and I was miserable, so I broke up with her and I told her she was annoying and how we weren't meant for each other. It didn't help I was talking about her behind her back. A few days later, I started to feel horrible for what I said and did to her everyday it's been killing me inside more and more. I eventually did get around to apologizing but she didn't believe me, she figured I was just bullting her so I would come back and do the same stuff I did in the past it would all end up the same. I still have some feelings for her and I wouldn't care if I could just be friends with her but I don't see it happening. She's still angry. I've seen stuff she's posted and a lot of it shows "I hate you (My name)". It's been about 8 months now, and I've been fine, but lately it's just been bothering me and it's all I can think about it. I know I was a selfish jerk and I've learned from my mistakes, I just want her to believe I'm sorry and just talk things out. If there's no hope then I understand I'll just have to move on and forget about her, but it's hard.. I messed up. I'm only human. I guess I just needed to vent, seek advice, as I feel uncomfortable talking about this with my friends or family and would rather talk about it "Anonymously".