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-   -   Young girlfriend of 6.5 years breaks it off (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=459361)

  • Mar 21, 2010, 05:12 PM
    ouohyeah
    Young GF of 6.5 years breaks it off
    Hey,
    I have been reading through a lot of these threads trying to find one that is similar to my situation, but I couldn't really find it, I hope you guys could give me some sort of insight and advice or whatever.
    This girl and I met when I was 16 and she was 14. I was a junior in HS and she was a Freshman. We would have been together for 7 years this June. I know this is not a common thing, and as I have just learned, was probably not too healthy.
    I went away to school 2.5 hours away while she finished HS and we stayed together, faithfully, all four of those years until I just recently moved back last summer. What is strange is that we were happier when we wouldn't see each other for two weeks at a time while I was in school than we were recently. (absence makes the heart grow fonder etc... )
    So today, she comes over and tells me she doesn't know/remember what it is like to not have someone else to please and just to focus on herself. I have to admit, I love this girl more than anything so you could only imagine that scene. She also says, and has said for a while that she never got to experience what normal girls experience at her age (21). I can see where she is coming from. Definitely. But it's not like I got to experience it either. I haven't flirted with another girl in 6.5 years. Seriously.
    So here is why I am posting. I know everyone thinks that their relationship and their GF was THE ONE and they are in denial after the breakup, just like I am now hah. However, I truly believe that we do maybe have a future together and she says that she does too, and I realize she may just be saying that to let me down easy. But come on, 6.5 years? That is not normal for young kids and that is one reason why I think we may be different from every other couple, we had something incredibly special for so long and worked through so much at such a young age. What are your thoughts on all of this? I appreciate it, a lot.
    May I also add that she has been going through tons of stress within the last month with school and money issues. Could this be a reason she is second guessing me right now?
  • Mar 21, 2010, 05:20 PM
    talaniman

    She wants her freedom, so give it to her. She has grown the last few years, and wants to be free, so step aside, and do your own thing, because that's what she wants to do.

    We all have to find our own way in life, so do you, but without her. Sorry for your loss.
  • Mar 21, 2010, 10:41 PM
    the_original

    Sorry about your loss dude, give her some space ad time to figure things out
  • Mar 21, 2010, 11:20 PM
    Jake2008

    I find that your relationshp is unusually mature for your ages, considering that you were only 14 and 16 when you started going together, and it lasted over six years.

    In this day and age that age is more prone to a boyfriend/girlfriend everyother week, friends with benefits, and babies being born. Just my opinion, but as well as that, some marriages don't even last that long.

    So, it does not seem to be an age thing in my opinion but rather a practical, and mature decision by her, to experience life more on her own, and find her own independence.

    She may love you very much, and I suspect she does, but looking at it from her point of view, being in one relationship since she was 16 years old, did not leave her time to live her life with any freedom.

    She is also smart to make the changes now, instead of keeping you hanging on when she's going in a different direction. I'm glad she is being honest with you.

    My advice to you is to accept what she wants to do. Don't spend your life waiting for her to come back, but live your life too.

    Life is too short for regrets.
  • Mar 21, 2010, 11:27 PM
    the_original

    Jake 2008 is right, everyone has a right to live a little, yourself included. Make the best of it man, she was very mature about the way she handled it so I would respect her wishes. It will be hard but once you start living your life things can only go up

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