What are the best puns you can think of?

Why am I so great with puns?
Cause I'm from PUNsylvania!

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.


Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.


I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

What do you call an earthquake fault?
A topographical error.:)

:)

No these aren't mine, they are from Pun of the Day - Funny Puns, Jokes, One Liners, Word Play and Humor I just picked out some good ones :D

Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted.

It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

Math teachers have lots of problems.

Be true to your teeth, or they will be false to you.

A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.

Novice pirates make terrible singers because they can't hit the high seas.

I got angry when my cell phone battery died. My counselor suggested I find an outlet.

I got a deal on a new computer, and they threw in the operating system to boot.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

(You went to the same site as me huh M :p )

Did you hear about the new line of Elvis Presley-themed steakhouses?

They will be for people who love meat tender.:)

Shenzi: What's the hurry? We'd love you to stick around for dinner.
Banzai: Yeah. We could have whatever's "lion" around.
Shenzi: Oh wait, wait, wait. I got one, I got one. Make mine a "cub" sandwich. Whatcha think?
[Ed points]
Shenzi: What, Ed?
Banzai: Hey, did we order this dinner to go?
Shenzi: No, why?
Banzai: Cause there it goes!

:D

Hahaha I love puns