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-   -   Can calling too much ruin a relationship? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=450841)

  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:20 PM
    mallie2196
    Can calling too much ruin a relationship?
    I've got a question how can I grow up and not be so inmature towards the person I love? The only reason I'm not with him now is because he thinks I'm to inmature and wants me to grow up.. I also call him to muchh. I think if he doesn't talk to me I think something else is going on.. and I want to be with him so I have to complete these tasks. Does anyone have any suggestions for? Much appericated
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:22 PM
    dynocompe

    This is a honest answer, get some therapy, talk to a counsellor or therapist.
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:22 PM
    I wish

    How old are you?

    Did he give you examples of immature acts?
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:25 PM
    mallie619

    Yes I'm 18 and he said starting drama and hanging out with people younger than me is what is inmature and there was a night when I talked to him and we were cusing and stuff at each other and he said that wasn't right
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:37 PM
    mallie619
    How can I grow up in a relationship?
    How can I trust the one I love without wondering all the time what he's doing?
    I'm so confused and don't know what to do..
    I want to keep him but I don't know how
    Any suggestions?
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:39 PM
    dynocompe

    Why start a new thread?
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:41 PM
    mallie619

    I don't know sorry
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:44 PM
    Enigma1999

    Hello Mallie,

    First off, if you really want to keep this person, then you need to build some trust. The key to a good solid relationship is trust and communication. No man likes to be tied down. I have a couple of questions for you, how old are you? Also, ow long have you two been dating? Last is, what or why is it that you feel the need to know his every move?
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:44 PM
    dynocompe

    You have to learn to trust him, while he is out with his friends or doing whatever, you go out with your friends! Or get a hobby, something to keep your mind off him and worrying about him.
    If he is up to no good and can't be trusted, then move on from the relationship.
    If he loves you, and is a good man, he will be faithful to you and everything will be fine and you have nothing to worry about.
    You shouldn't worry about your boyfriend cheating on you anyway, if he does cheat on you, I would rather find out now that he is a cheater than 6 years down the road when your married and have kids
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:46 PM
    dynocompe

    If this was all on the same thread you wikl avoid the same questions being asked, she is 18
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:49 PM
    Enigma1999

    Hello Mallie,

    One thing that I have learned is that people are going to do what they want to do. It is what it is. So A: You can trust him and let him have his space. Or B: You can trust him and let him have his space. It's real simple. I see you are 18,how old is he?
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:51 PM
    mallie619

    19 and he broke up with me the other day. And told me I need to grow up and stop being so childish and immature how do I do this and told me I need to stop hanging with people that like to start drama..
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:52 PM
    J_9
    Are you and Mally2196 the same person? Maybe lost your password?
  • Feb 23, 2010, 04:54 PM
    mallie619

    Nope I just started this thing lol
  • Feb 23, 2010, 05:01 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by mallie619 View Post
    nope i just started this thing lol

    Interesting. The name is the same as well as the numbers, just different order and the 2 is left out.
  • Feb 23, 2010, 05:04 PM
    Enigma1999

    Hello again Mallie,

    Your original question was, "How can I grow up and not be immature towards the person I love?" That's a difficult question if you think about it, because what one person may feel is immature, another may not. Now, common knowledge says that calling and checking up on a persons where-abouts can be considered childish. You are only 18, you will grow into your own. Right now, at your age you are insecure. That will change in time. I don't fault you for this. There is nothing wrong with you. It's normal, more than you know, and even for women in their 20's and 30's. You will learn to get a hold of it. The best thing for you to do, is to sit down and talk to him about it. Your friends are your friends, and what ever they do or how they act is them. Not you. As far as calling him and checking up on him, you should mellow out a little. Give him space. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

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