Threads merged, please stop creating new threads.

Recently, actually a few days ago, my girlfriend of 2 1/2 years left. After a huge blowup fight and me saying some horrible harsh things to her, that I should have never said. The past couple months Ive gotten vary comfortable with us, I quit doing the things I use to do, hell I didn't even do anything for her on our 2 years anniversary, even when we discussed we would celebrate it a month after the true date, due to financial reason. The fight started when I found out she was texting a older guy, 33 with 3 kids, she is 22, she has told me he has been there for her when I wasn't. She tells me there is absolutely nothing going on with them, she said she stills love me but can't live unhappy anymore. The past couple days the fact set in she is gone. I have done a lot of thinking about myself and what I did wrong. I always said I treated her like a queen, but I guess I never asked her if she felt like one... I truly do understand what went wrong, it was me not being there emotionally for her anymore, it sux... I am ready to fix things, I have talked to her and I know she still cares and loves me, she just can't be unhappy all her life. I am dead ready to fix myself and be her everything... What do I do now to get her back, we still talked everyday, so... please any advice... she is my everything and I feel like my true soul mate, I love her more than anything

PS. I was planning on proposing to her this week actually :(

Though you may be ready to give it another shot, she might not. Her feelings for you may have changed. You can't force her to get back with you, but you can let her know how you feel and see how she reacts and accept whatever she says.

If your still talking everyday, then you should show her with actions, not words, that you get it, and will change.

If you can't figure out what your soul mate wants and needs from you, your not her soul mate, and you shouldn't have treated her like a piece of furniture.

You show love with actions not words, so what is she saying about taking you back? Does she believe you will be a good boy now, or is she saying its too late for that?

Sometimes when the thrill is gone, its really gone.

She says she loves me, yet she does not want to be unhappy, when I tell her all that I have realized she breaks down from her hard cold front and shows she actually does care... she leads me to believe that she wants to be with me, yet she just wants me to change, she told me that she was moving out because if not nothing would ever change and our problems would keep getting worse and worse... I just wish I was such a hard headed idiot and believe her when she tried to tell me what's wrong.. ive figure out though my problems and am ready to really prove to my love that I've finally got it, and understand what when wrong, I just don't know if it is too soon to start with telling all this, or if I'm just going to push her away, but I know she still loves me and I've been in such a rush to make things right, in fear someone else will take her away from me for good.

Lose the fear and back up and work on yourself so you can change. Convincing her is another issue and whether she cares or not, she is still afraid to believe you.

I don't blame her at all, but do the work, and see what she thinks later. Her moving on is a risk you have to take, but that has to be better than pushing her, and not making the right changes.

You are right as its to soon in telling her all this without actions that she can believe in.

Leave it alone a while.

Sorry you are hurting.

I think the fact that she is on the cruise will give you time to sit back, relax and try to gather yourself for when she gets back.

I would recommend not trying to get ahold of her, or emailing etc. Just give her some space. And maybe even really think about whether you want to be with a girl like the one you have described.

Threads merged

Me and my ex broke up after 2 1/2 years 2 weeks ago, we broke up after a huge blowup fight after I found a guy texting her "good morning pumkin" she moved out 3 days later, I tried so bad to get her back, but she wasn't having it.. she said she needed time. Recently we talked and I found out the guy she was texting is a 35 yr old married man with 3 kids.. she swares to me there are just friends... The past couple days she sends me text messages saying she misses me, and wants me to come over.. but the next day she wants nothing to do with me... she textes this guy a lot, everyday like 50 times, the first thing she does when she wakes up is text him, I see all our cell phone activity on our shared phone website, along with some long phone calls to this guy... she is playing with my head... she swear this guy and her are just friends, but I found out today, which is her birthday, that he sent her 2 dozen roses in a fancy vase to her work.. I don't know what to think, I'm too the point I don't even want to be with her.. I have lost all respect for her, she has become a homewrecker... she was talking to this guy the last month of our relationship behind my back, I love her to death and I was planning on spending the rest of my life with her.. she still swears she has not done anything with this married guy, but I don't believe her.. im so lost, I don't want to be with her, but every time she calls I still bend over backwards for anythings she wants.. when I talk to her all the feelings come back, we our in the process of sorting through all our stuff at our house we lived in for 2 years, then I'm moving back in with my dad.. idk what to do, do you think she will ever change, I know once I'm gone for good she is going to relize what she has done, she still says she loves me, but I can't take the pain anymore.. what am I suppose to do? Thanks for any reply!! :(

Leave her idiot. Seriously forget her, there is nothing she needs time for. You're allowing yourself to give her time to decide whether she wants to be with you or mess around with some married dude. Obviously she doesn't think much of you. Kick her to the curb asap and forget about her. Get a new girl, become successful and let her regret what she lost. She sounds immature. If she herself doesn't know what she wants, how can she be loyal to you.. drop her asap. If I were you I'd move out and tell her that I don't ever want to see her again.

Get your stuff sorted out,including the phones, then go no contact.

Whatever mess she is in -with a married man- have nothing more to do with this.

I understand what went wrong and I have learned to treat her like the gorgeous princess she is.. Rencently though she has been wanting to hang out, we went to the movies tonight and I've been trying to show her how happy I can make her.. we even held hands all thro the movie and kiss by.. how do I make her relize how much of a idiot I was and prove to her I can be her everything she says she is afraid things will go back to the way they use to be... I love her to death she is my world.. what should I do?

Magic word brother, TIME. She needs time to see the real change in you and you need to keep showing her. She will see it. You just need to be patient I think. Sometimes people need to see it to believe it you know what I mean.

As long as she's still willing to hang out with you, it means that you still have a chance together.

Keep improving yourself, treat her well and things will fall in place naturally. No need to force the issue.

Let your newly improved and positive attitude speak for itself.

Sounds like things are getting better already.
Not only have you realised your past mistakes and fixing them but she's giving you another go, which are both good

She is hardly a princess if she dumps you, and takes to texting, and messing with a married guy. Maybe that's something you should have been paying attention to, before you continue to get carried away by your feelings.

Yes,what's happening with 'Mr Understanding'-is he no longer around to offer his sympathy?